Middle East Jokes

What do you call sheep in the Middle East?

Arak of lamb

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What's an argument in the Middle East but a compliment in the U.S.A?

You da bomb" "No, you da bomb!"

What's the most popular pub in the Middle East?

The Allahu ak-Bar

How Did I Make It To The Middle East?

Iran there.

What is the most popular kids show in the Middle East?

Dora the EXPLODER

What do an Iraqi baby, an American president, and a homesick Brit visiting Jerusalem all want?

They all want either pees, peace or peas in the middle east.

What language do bugs in the Middle East speak?

Scarabic

What is a goat herder known as in the Middle East?

A Pimp

Why aren't there any Wal-Marts in the middle east?

Because there's a Target on every corner

What do you call a myth from the middle east?

A turban legend

Where's a good place to get Italian food in the middle east?

Allah Garden.

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What's a good example that oil is a bad lubricant?

Middle East

What's the Middle East's favorite candy?

YemenHeads

What do you call innocent women and children dying in the middle east?

Freedom

Why aren't there any Walmarts in the middle east?

Because there's Targets around every corner.

Why can't there be peace in the Middle East?

It IS what it IS.

Who says Jesus couldn't perform miracles?

He managed to find mates named Matthew, Mark, Luke and John hanging around in the Middle East.

What do you call a research facility in the middle east?

Darpa Darpa

Why won't A Flock of Seagulls perform in the Middle East?

Iran so far away

What do they call spiders in the Middle East?

Iraqnids

What do you call spiders in the Middle East?

Iraqnids. Yep. An original.

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Why do people regard the middle east as the holy land?

Because they're constantly drilling for oil.

Why are there no Wal-Marts in the middle east?

Because there are too many Targets

What's the most disappointing country in the Middle East?

Oman

When was pasta introduced to the Middle East?

When someone fed a genie alfredo

What phrase is a compliment in America, but an argument in the Middle East?

No, YOU the bomb.

Why can't there ever be peace in the Middle East?

We can't even get FIVE DENTISTS to agree on a toothpaste. That's why.

What do you call Call Of Duty in the middle east?

Tuesday

Why is the middle east the best place to open a store at the moment?

Because business is booming.

What do they call Counter-Strike in the Middle East?

Tuesday.

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P.U.

Where did the universe attend college?

At the university.

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How does the recipe for German chocolate cake begin?

First, invade ze kitchen...

What did Putin say when the world got mad at him for invading the Ukraine?

Cri-me-a river!

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Why did the poor art collector only buy miniature paintings?

He wanted more Monet in his wallet.

Why did the chicken cross the road half-way?

She wanted to lay it on the line.

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What was the favorite food of the thrifty Italian who loved contractions?

A pasta free.

What do you call a homeless Italian man?

Giovanni Change

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What do you call someone who gets stoned and baked?

A witch.

What do you call a man of high authority, stoned out of his mind strolling along in the forest?

Hiking

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How do you play Iraqi bingo?

F18...B52...F18

What do an Iraqi baby, an American president, and a homesick Brit visiting Jerusalem all want?

They all want either pees, peace or peas in the middle east.

Visit Jokes More Visit Jokes

Why should you not visit the Ukraine with your fly unzipped?

Because if you don't, Chernobyl fall out!

Why would anybody ever want to visit New Brunswick?

I hear their bowling alleys are pretty nice.

Wal Marts Jokes More Wal Marts Jokes

Why aren't there any Wal-Marts in the middle east?

Because there's a Target on every corner

Why are there no Wal-Marts in the middle east?

Because there are too many Targets