Middle East Jokes

What do you call sheep in the Middle East?

Arak of lamb

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How Did I Make It To The Middle East?

Iran there.

What is the most popular kids show in the Middle East?

Dora the EXPLODER

What do an Iraqi baby, an American president, and a homesick Brit visiting Jerusalem all want?

They all want either pees, peace or peas in the middle east.

What language do bugs in the Middle East speak?

Scarabic

Why aren't there any Wal-Marts in the middle east?

Because there's a Target on every corner

What do you call a myth from the middle east?

A turban legend

Where's a good place to get Italian food in the middle east?

Allah Garden.

What's a good example that oil is a bad lubricant?

Middle East

What's the Middle East's favorite candy?

YemenHeads

What do you call innocent women and children dying in the middle east?

Freedom

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Why aren't there any Walmarts in the middle east?

Because there's Targets around every corner.

Who says Jesus couldn't perform miracles?

He managed to find mates named Matthew, Mark, Luke and John hanging around in the Middle East.

Why won't A Flock of Seagulls perform in the Middle East?

Iran so far away

What do they call spiders in the Middle East?

Iraqnids

What do you call spiders in the Middle East?

Iraqnids. Yep. An original.

Why do people regard the middle east as the holy land?

Because they're constantly drilling for oil.

Why are there no Wal-Marts in the middle east?

Because there are too many Targets

What's the most disappointing country in the Middle East?

Oman

When was pasta introduced to the Middle East?

When someone fed a genie alfredo

What phrase is a compliment in America, but an argument in the Middle East?

No, YOU the bomb.

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Why can't there ever be peace in the Middle East?

We can't even get FIVE DENTISTS to agree on a toothpaste. That's why.

What do they call Counter-Strike in the Middle East?

Tuesday.

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How many millennials does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None, it's already lit fam.

How many millennials does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two. One to do it, the other to give him his ribbon.

Compliment Jokes More Compliment Jokes

Why are Bananas and Chocolate Good friends?

They compliment each other nicely.

How many "friend zoned" guys does it take to change a lightbulb?

How many "friend zoned" guys does it take to change a light bulb? None. They just compliment it and get mad when it won't screw.

Italian Jokes More Italian Jokes

What do you call a robbery of Italian ice cream?

Grand Theft Gelato

What did the Italian say when the eel swam by?

That's a Moray.

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

Who are these women?

Women working at 900 numbers.

How many women have you slept with My wife asked me, "How many women have you slept with?

I proudly replied, "Only you, Darling. With all the others I was awake."

Exploder Jokes More Exploder Jokes

What is the most popular kids show in the Middle East?

Dora the EXPLODER

Stone Jokes More Stone Jokes

What did the Time Traveller find when he brought a joint to Ancient Greece?

The Philosophers Stoned

What's the difference between a hippie and a geologist?

Not much. One likes getting stones, the other likes getting stoned.

Bug Jokes More Bug Jokes

Why don't other bugs like earwigs?

Because they are always earwigging their conversations!

What language do bugs in the Middle East speak?

Scarabic

Allahu Ak Bar Jokes More Allahu Ak Bar Jokes

Where do terrorists go for a drink?

The Allahu Ak-Bar.

Where do terrorists like to go for a drink?

The Allahu Ak Bar