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Sheet Music Jokes

How do you get a guitar player to shut up?

Put sheet music in front of him

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How do you get a guitar player to turn down his amp?

Give him sheet music.

How do you confuse a drummer?

Give him sheet music

What's the best way to get your guitar player to turn down the volume?

Give him the sheet music.

Why did the zombie start ripping up sheet music?

Because he was de-composing.

Why did the composer spend all his time in bed?

He wrote sheet music.

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Amp Jokes More Amp Jokes

What do you call a guy with no arms &amp no legs laying in a pile of leaves?

Russel

Why do Nuns always wear Black &amp?

White? No particular reason, it's just a habit they have.

Start Jokes More Start Jokes

How do you make a small fortune out of horses?

Start off with a large fortune!

What's wet on the inside, hairy on the outside, starts with C and ends in T?

Coconut.

Confuse Jokes More Confuse Jokes

How do you confuse an AP student?

Make the first 21 questions all be the answer C.

Why were ancient Egyptian children confused?

Because their daddies were mummies.

Shut Jokes More Shut Jokes

What do you call a conservative toothbrush that won't shut up?

Brush Limbaugh

Which one do you let in?

The dog, once he's in, he shuts up!

Rip Jokes More Rip Jokes

Did you hear that the police have a warrant out on a midget psychic ripping people off?

It reads "Small medium at large."

What did the Scotsman say when he ripped his trousers?

Och noo, me troosers!

Write Jokes More Write Jokes

What is something all Hispanic people write in college?

An ese.

What did you learn in school today Son: How to write Mother: What did you write?

Son: I don't know they haven't taught us how to read yet!

Composer Jokes More Composer Jokes

Why was the composer late for work?

He missed Debussy. I'll just leave.

What do composers prepare their ingredients on?

A Chopin board

Volume Jokes More Volume Jokes

What is the volume of a disk with radius z and height a?

Pi * z * z * a

What is the volume of Monica Lewinsky's mouth?

One US Leader