Shore Jokes

What did the ocean say to the shore?

Nothing, it just waved.

Love

What did one ocean say to the other ocean?

Nothing! They just WAVED. SEA what I did there? I'm SHORE you did. Let MINNOW if you are not getting it. SHELL I continue?? No?.. I guess I'll stop WHALE I'm ahead. Thanks ladies and gentlefish

Why does the Coast Guard have a 6 foot height requirement?

So when their ship sinks they can walk back to shore.

Why didn't Natalie Wood take a shower on the boat?

She wanted to wash up on shore

What would Jesus do?

Is an unfair question. He had superpowers. Your lifeboat is sinking. WWJD Well, he'd get out and walk to shore. See

Why did Bill go out to sea on an aircraft carrier?

To promote off-shore drilling.

Why be it that land-lubbers are never confident?

For they are always on shore...

What did the girl sea say when the boy sea asked her for a date?

Shore.

What did the ocean say to the shore?

Nothing, it just waved.

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Ship Jokes More Ship Jokes

What did the sea monster have for dinner?

Fish and ships.

What do you call a ship that drives itself?

Auto-pirate.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a feminist and incense sticks?

Incense sticks make scents.

What's the difference between a $20 steak and a $55 steak?

February 14th.

Laundry Jokes More Laundry Jokes

What do you do when an epileptic has a seizure in a bathtub?

Throw in your laundry.

What do you do when you see Michael J. Fox in a bathtub?

Throw in a load of laundry.

Walk Jokes More Walk Jokes

What do pirates and pimps have in common?

They both say "YO HO!" and walk with a limp!

What has four legs and goes "Oom! Oom!"?

A cow walking backwards!

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why did the gamer start working out?

He wanted to finally get respecced.

Why did the bodybuilder buy a dictionary?

Because he wanted to get more definition.

Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

How much does Jesus love you?

Thiiiiiiis much. (Must be said while arms are raised out to side)

What do Hispanic parents say to teach their son to drive?

Jesus, take the wheel!

Sea Jokes More Sea Jokes

Why do seagulls fly over the sea, not the bay?

If they flew over the bay, they would be bagels

What did the giant wave say to the man?

Nothing he just waved. Sea what I did there? Sorry sometimes I get a bit carried away, it like a tsunami of puns. Water these puns! they're horrible, I'll stop now.

Shower Jokes More Shower Jokes

Why don't they have showers on airplanes?

Because of the towel ban.

What are you gonna do today?

Me: Shower. W: ...what else M: Make a new iTunes playlist. W: Wow. M: Might not have time for a shower.