Ocean Jokes

Why is the ocean so salty?

Because the land never waves back

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Why did Greenpeace throw Wolf Blitzer in the ocean?

They wanted to restore the CNNomies

What do you call a #robot stranded in the ocean?

A row bot.

What do you call a thousand lawyers, chained to the bottom of the ocean?

A start.

What did the ocean say to the shore?

Nothing, it just waved.

Why are oceans so salty?

Because the Earth is always tilted.

What did one ocean say to the other ocean?

Nothing! They just WAVED. SEA what I did there? I'm SHORE you did. Let MINNOW if you are not getting it. SHELL I continue?? No?.. I guess I'll stop WHALE I'm ahead. Thanks ladies and gentlefish

What lies on the bottom of the ocean and shakes?

A nervous wreck.

Why was the ocean always sad?

Because the beach never waved back.

Why are airplane crashes in the ocean so visible?

They're plane to sea

What do you call it when you tie a brick to a jar of Miracle Whip and throw it into the ocean?

Sink-o de Mayo

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How do animals cross the ocean?

On a Gir-raft.

Why did the fish blush?

Because it saw the ocean's bottom.

What is the most dishonest fish in the ocean?

A lionfish

What did the Ocean say to the Beach?

Nothing, it just waved... Prolly my favorite joke of all time, maybe ever.

Why did the plane crash into the ocean?

The pilot was a loaf of bread

What'd the ocean say to the other ocean?

Nothing they just waved.... I'll show my self out

Why did the ocean take a bath?

It had a sandy bottom.

What did one ocean say to the other?

I'm not completely shore, but it must have been pretty deep.

What did the ocean say to the river?

You can run but you can't tide.

What do you call a man in the ocean with no arms or legs?

Bob.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the ocean?

Bob

Why did the shark cross the ocean?

To get to the other tide!

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs floating in the ocean?

Bob

What do you call 10 lawyers chained to the bottom of the ocean?

A good start.

What happens when you throw a laptop into the ocean?

You have a Dell, rolling in the deep.

What do you call a dog with no legs in the ocean?

Bob Barker

What do you call a laptop in the ocean?

A Dell, rolling in the deep.

What is 4,000 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start.

What do you use to cut the ocean?

A seasaw

What do you get when you cross the ocean with a Train Station?

A Whale Way

What do you call......a man with no arms and no legs in the ocean?

Bob

What lives in the ocean is grouchy and hates neighbours?

A hermit crab!

What do you call a man in the middle of the ocean with no arms or legs?

Bob

Why did the hippie drowned in the ocean?

Because he was too far out. Ba dum bum tissss

What do you call a group of singing people floating around in the ocean?

An acappellago

What kind of hair do oceans have?

Wavy hair.

How do ghosts navigate the ocean?

They use boo-eys.

Why did the chicken cross the ocean?

To get out-of-range of North Korea's nukes.

What do you call 500 dead lawyers chained together at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start

Why did Daenerys cross the road?

To be that much closer to crossing the ocean.

Why'd the guy panic and call 911 when he realized an ocean was forming around him?

It was an emergent sea.

What "bus" crossed the ocean?

Columbus.

What has two knees and swims in the ocean?

A Two-knee fish!.....

What happens when you throw root beer in the ocean?

Root Beer Floats!

Why do people always ask me for directions?

I have no clue where I am going. I am sure i have sent 100's of people into the ocean.

What do you call a pc that fell in the ocean?

A Dell rolling in the deep.

Where can you find an ocean without any water?

On a map!

What is an obstetrician's favorite part of the ocean?

It's the sea section.

What letter stands for the ocean?

The letter C.

What did the ocean ask the scooba diver?

Water you doing here

What doesn't get any wetter no matter how much it rains?

The ocean

What do you call a personal laptop floating in the ocean?

A Dell - Rolling In The Deep

What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in the ocean?

Bob

Why'd the British man cross the ocean?

Freedom.

What do you call 10'000 lawyers chained together at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!

What do you call a money lender who lives in the ocean?

A loan shark!

What did the ocean said to the river when they parted ways?

Nothing, he was just full of tears

What kind of bus can cross the ocean?

A Columbus.

What makes the ocean roar?

You'd roar too if you had crabs on your bottom

Why won't the ocean let us drink its water?

Because it's too salty.

What do you do if the Ocean stares at you?

Sea it and Wave

What kind of hair do oceans have?

Wavy!

Why did the hippie drown in the ocean?

He was too far out.

What kind of chocolate swims in the ocean?

ScubGodivas.

Why do we have oceans?

Because based god and acid god had a baby.

What did the ocean say to the beach?

Thanks for all the sediment.

What did the ocean say to the shore?

Nothing, it just waved.

What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?

A nervous wreck.

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What does Miley Cyrus have for Christmas Dinner?

Twerky! I thought of that yesterday, apologies if you've heard it a thousand times already.

What kind of laptop calls you a thousand times?

A dell

Bobby Jokes More Bobby Jokes

Who's there! Bobby! Bobby who?

Bobby-n up and down like this!

Tilt Jokes More Tilt Jokes

What did off-center say to tilted?

I don't know either he told me to askew!

Why are oceans so salty?

Because the Earth is always tilted.

Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away its USB cable.

Why didn't you stop at that red light?

Motorist: Then you would have caught up with me.

Guess Jokes More Guess Jokes

What do you call a master at guessing Anime characters?

Guesu

What be a Pirates favorite letter?

Ye all must be willin' to guess Arrrr. But ye be wrong! It be the Sea! Yearha har har har

Shore Jokes More Shore Jokes

What did the ocean say to the shore?

Nothing, it just waved.

What did the girl sea say when the boy sea asked her for a date?

Shore.

Mexican Jokes More Mexican Jokes

What do you call a Mexican Aunt?

A tor-tia.

Why did the Mexican school girl get pregnant?

Here teacher said to go home and do her "essay".

Earth Jokes More Earth Jokes

Why is the moon tastier than Earth?

It's meteor.

Why did the Moon break up with Earth?

The Moon said they were slowly drifting apart.