Spock Jokes

How many ears does Spock have?

The left ear, the right ear and the Final Front-ear.

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Why didn't Spock do a mind meld with Frodo?

Because he figured that would be a bad hobbit to get in to.

What did Mr. Spock find in the toilet?

The Captains log

What did Spock find in the Enterprise Bathroom?

The Captain's Log.

What did Spock find in the toilet?

Captain's log.

What does Spock sing in the shower?

I'll stop the world and meld with you!

What did Spock find in the toilet of the Starship Enterprise?

The Captain's Log.

What did Spock find in the Enterprises's toilet?

The captain's log!

Why did Spock dump his wife?

Because William Shatner I know it's old, but I love it so

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Why don't the British make computers?

They can't figure out how to make them leak oil.

What's it called when you fry up an egg with a bunch of different ingredients?

Omelette you figure it out

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Where is my favourite body part?

Its right ear!

How many ears does Daniel Boone have?

He's got a right ear, a left ear, and a frontier.

Vulcan Jokes More Vulcan Jokes

What do you call a Vulcan sheep?

Shbaaaaaaaahk

What does a Vulcan lawnmower need to function?

A spock plug.

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What happened when the USS Enterprise got a new toilet?

William Shatner

Why did lieutenant Uhura smell bad?

Because William Shatner

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What does Spock sing in the shower?

I'll stop the world and meld with you!

Why didn't Spock do a mind meld with Frodo?

Because he figured that would be a bad hobbit to get in to.

Function Jokes More Function Jokes

What does a calculus teacher say when a student doesn't get it?

Bro, do you even function?

How do functions Break-Up?

They stop calling each other.

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Why did the Irishman wear two condoms?

To be sure to be sure

When I walked to the register with the condoms the clerk asked "Would you like a bag?

I replied "No, she's not that ugly"

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What about over there?

She said. "I can't," I replied, "It says between 1 and 9 only." "Well, why is that stopping you " "I'm 23."

What's the difference between Polio and 9/11?

The government actually wanted to stop Polio.