Vegas Jokes

Why have no melons ever gotten married in Vegas?

Because they can't elope!

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

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Why couldn't the watermelon get married in Vegas?

Because his fiancee is a cantaloupe!

Why didn't the melons get married in Vegas?

Because they cantaloupe. This joke was brought to you by Dads inc.

What's the hottest hotel in Vegas?

The Cosmopolitan

Why was the rooster happy after his trip to Vegas?

He got clucky.

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Realize Jokes More Realize Jokes

What did the starfish say when it realized that it lost it's ability to regenerate limbs?

I can't remember.

What do you have when you just used the toilet and realized there's no toilet paper?

A real mess on your hands.

Rooster Jokes More Rooster Jokes

What shoes do roosters wear?

Chickenstocks

What do you get if you cross a phone with a rooster?

A wake-up call!

Watermelon Jokes More Watermelon Jokes

Whats the difference between a watermelon and a baby?

One is fun to smash with a sledgehammer and the other one is a watermelon

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon?

One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer, the other is a watermelon.

Melon Jokes More Melon Jokes

What did one Melon say to the other after it was asked marry it?

We Can't Alope

Why did the melon have commitment issues?

Because he cantaloupe

Ocean Jokes More Ocean Jokes

What do you call a thousand lawyers, chained to the bottom of the ocean?

A start.

What do you do if the Ocean stares at you?

Sea it and Wave

Casino Jokes More Casino Jokes

What did the nun wear to the casino?

Her gambling habit.

How do you walk out of a Casino with $1 Million?

Walk in with $2 Million.

Neck Jokes More Neck Jokes

Why do cows wear bells around there neck?

Because there horns don't work.

What does a blond and a beer bottle have in common?

They're both empty from the neck up.

Decide Jokes More Decide Jokes

What did the fast food employee do when he decided to quit?

He chicken tendered his resignation.

What's your excuse?

Well my dad says the world is changing every day. So I decided to wait until it settles down!