Amazon Jokes

Why do fanfic writers like Amazon Prime?

They get free two-day shipping.

April Sale

Love Card

$5.99

What is the best food to order from Amazon?

Prime Rib

Why was Amazon angry after their conference with Samsung?

After taking Notes, they realized their was no way they could sell the Fire.

Why does Barbie hate Amazon?

Because they're always putting sales out on ken-dolls.

Whats the derivative of Amazon?

Amazon prime.

Where does Wonder Woman buy all her stuff?

Amazon.

What's the difference between Amazon Prime and the Amazon River?

The Amazon River actually has sails.

What's the worst cut of steak?

Amazon Prime.

Why can't you be successful like your brother?

Amazon: heh Optimus: But I saved humanity from Decepticons! Thanksgiving at the Primes

Why is working at Amazon warehouse like being a coke addict?

You spend 10 hours a day doing nothing but clearing lines.

What do you call someone who makes a lot of money through deforestation of the Amazon?

A Brazillionaire!

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I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

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Who's there! Amazon! Amazon who?

Amazon of a gun!

What did Descartes say while shopping online?

I think therefore I Amazon

What do mathematicians use to get fast delivery?

Amazon'

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How much did the pirate pay to get his ears pierced?

A buck 'n ear

What do they use to pay for things in the Vatican?

Paypal

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What is the best food to order from Amazon?

Prime Rib

What is the first derivative of a cow?

A prime rib.

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How much for the best friend?

Manager: Sir, we've been through this, our cashiers aren't for sale.

Why does Barbie hate Amazon?

Because they're always putting sales out on ken-dolls.

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Why does Barbie hate Amazon?

Because they're always putting sales out on ken-dolls.

How do you see if the Ken doll is ticklish?

Give him test tickles.

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What do you call a line of Barbies?

A. A Barbecue!

Why was Barbie kicked out of the toy box?

Because she kept sitting on Pinocchio's face moaning, "lie to me!"

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What's the best way to prepare a turkey for Thanksgiving dinner?

Just be *honest* with it man...

What do Japanese people say after a Thanksgiving prayer?

Ra'men.

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Where does Wonder Woman buy all her stuff?

Amazon.

What does Wonder Woman call foreplay?

Amazon Prime.