Amazon Jokes

Why do fanfic writers like Amazon Prime?

They get free two-day shipping.

March Madness Sale

I Love Pizza & You

$5.99

What is the best food to order from Amazon?

Prime Rib

Why was Amazon angry after their conference with Samsung?

After taking Notes, they realized their was no way they could sell the Fire.

Why does Barbie hate Amazon?

Because they're always putting sales out on ken-dolls.

Whats the derivative of Amazon?

Amazon prime.

Where does Wonder Woman buy all her stuff?

Amazon.

What's the difference between Amazon Prime and the Amazon River?

The Amazon River actually has sails.

What's the worst cut of steak?

Amazon Prime.

Why can't you be successful like your brother?

Amazon: heh Optimus: But I saved humanity from Decepticons! Thanksgiving at the Primes

Why is working at Amazon warehouse like being a coke addict?

You spend 10 hours a day doing nothing but clearing lines.

What do you call someone who makes a lot of money through deforestation of the Amazon?

A Brazillionaire!

March Madness Sale

Love

$5.99

Who's there! Amazon! Amazon who?

Amazon of a gun!

What did Descartes say while shopping online?

I think therefore I Amazon

What do mathematicians use to get fast delivery?

Amazon'

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What did Wonder Woman tell The Flash when he saw that he was greying?

I still find you dashing

What does Wonder Woman call foreplay?

Amazon Prime.

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

What do you do when you hear a woman got hit by a car?

Wonder how the hell a car got into the kitchen

What do you tell a woman with a black eye?

Nothing, she's already been told twice.

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

What do you think Michael Hastings was working on before he died?

Slowing down his car....... shoutout to for this one.

Why is stormtrooper always late from work?

He keeps missing his train

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Why didn't the man buy Velcro shoes?

Because they were a rip off

What do you call a law enforcement agency that refuses to buy it's own vehicles?

The pro-lease department

Sail Jokes More Sail Jokes

How long does it take to sail from Dorne to Mereen?

It Varys.

What command does the aardvark give most often when he sails?

Snout about!

Brother Jokes More Brother Jokes

How many are you?

We are three. - Three - Me and my brother. - You have a brother - No why do you ask

Why can't you be successful like your brother?

Amazon: heh Optimus: But I saved humanity from Decepticons! Thanksgiving at the Primes

Samsung Jokes More Samsung Jokes

Who are the real Guardians of the Galaxy?

Security at Samsung.

What do you call security guards working outside Samsung shops?

Guardians of the galaxy

Fire Jokes More Fire Jokes

Why did the gifting company fire their last employee?

Because they got a bad wrap.

What do you call a 2x4 that lost its family to a fire?

Mourning wood