Beard Jokes

What happened when Santa cut his beard?

The police came and took statements but ultimately Mrs. Claus declined to press charges. OC

Everyday Deserves a Joke

Everyday Deserves a Joke

Who can shave 25 times in one day, and still have a beard?

A barber!

What do you call a man without a beard?

A woman.

How do philosophers shave off their beards?

Occam's razor

Why don't girls have beards?

It's in their "jeans"

Why does Sean Connery have no money and a beard?

Because he's no good at shaving.

What do you call a ceramicist with a beard?

A Harry Potter

Who can shave 25 times a day and still have a beard?

A barber.

Who can shave 30 times a day and still have a beard?

A barber.

You might also enjoy:

Santa Jokes More Santa Jokes

Why did it rain on Christmas Eve?

Because of Santa and his Raindeer.

What does Santa and Hackers have in common?

They both steal cookies)

Conspiracy Theorist Jokes More Conspiracy Theorist Jokes

Why do conspiracy theorists have such long beards?

Because they don't know how to use Occam's razor

How many conspiracy theorists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

We may never know the truth.

M'laysia Jokes More M'laysia Jokes

What's a neckbeard's favorite country?

M'laysia

What is a neck beard's favorite country?

M'Laysia

Press Jokes More Press Jokes

Why didn't the weightlifter like doing chest exercises with Coke cans?

Because it was soda pressing.

Why can't the hydraulic press guy bring himself to crush a can of sprite?

Because it's soda pressing

Statement Jokes More Statement Jokes

Why can't acids argue well?

All their statements are baseless.

What happened when Santa cut his beard?

The police came and took statements but ultimately Mrs. Claus declined to press charges. OC

Charge Jokes More Charge Jokes

What did the failing kidney say to the healthy one?

Urine charge now.

What knight of the round table never paid with cash when buying something?

Sir Charge

Clothe Jokes More Clothe Jokes

Where do the sith get their clothes?

Darth Mall

What dries your clothes but can also make you writhe around in agony?

A tumblr.

Oc Jokes More Oc Jokes

Why is Karl Marx credited in so many movies?

OC) Because he wrote the Rom-Communist Manifesto.

How do you keep your dog young for longer?

Keep them stored in some quality pupperware!