Crossfit Jokes

What's the hardest part about winning crossfit?

Being 5 foot 6

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How did Jesus get so ripped?

He does crossfit.

How did Jesus stay in shape?

Crossfit

What workout routine did Jesus stick to best?

Crossfit

What kind of exercise did Jesus do?

Crossfit

What do you call an exercise group run by Jesus Christ?

Crossfit.

How can you tell if someone does crossfit?

Don't worry, they'll tell you.

How do you know if somebody does crossfit?

They are probably in better shape than you.

What's the hardest part about being a Vegan who does Crossfit and owns a Rescue dog?

Deciding which to tell people first.

What did Jesus do to lose weight?

Crossfit

What's the difference between CrossFit and a cult?

A torn ACL

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Why did Jesus look so ripped during Crucifixion?

CrossFit

Why is Jesus Christ so buff?

Crossfit

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Why did the mayonnaise win the running race?

Because the tomato sauce couldn't Ketchup.

What could have been the most stuppidest result of Napolleonic wars if France won?

Tsar Napoleon.

Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

What would Jesus say if you angered him?

I'm Crossed.

What version of windows does Jesus use?

XP Edit: Explanation(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ChiRho)

Hate Jokes More Hate Jokes

Why do the police hate teenage fireflies?

They never stop lighting up.

Why do dentists only want to be awarded with paper certificates?

They hate plaque buildup.

5 Jokes More 5 Jokes

What does the pirates 5 trailer and the iPhone 7 have in common?

There's no jack

How many bassoonists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one but they'll insist on going through about 5 bulbs before they find one that suits this particular room and situation.

Weight Jokes More Weight Jokes

What does a bodybuilder do while waiting in a long line?

Weights

Why did Jared decide to gain all of his weight back?

The mall is hiring new Santas.

Decide Jokes More Decide Jokes

Why did Jared decide to gain all of his weight back?

The mall is hiring new Santas.

Why did Mr. Steaks decide he would take his wife's surname?

Because he didn't want his daughters to be called Ms. Steaks.

Stick Jokes More Stick Jokes

What do you call a man with a shovel stuck in his head?

An ambulance because that is a serious medical emergency that requires immediate attention.

What do you call a cow that's swallowed a stick of dynamite?

Abominable.

People Jokes More People Jokes

What's the one public place that most people still support the separation of Colors and Whites?

The laundromat.

What do you call a Pirate who lost his anchor?

Can't anchor us" /bow.. this is as clever as i get, people.. so sorry.