Frenchman Jokes

What's the difference between Frenchmen and some toast?

You can make soldiers out of toast!

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What is the life motto of a Frenchman?

No gain no pain.

What do you call ten Frenchmen who stand in front of their goalie for 90 minutes?

Dix.

What do you call a Frenchman wearing sandles?

Philippe Philoppe

What did the Frenchman say after 80?

Blaze it.

What did George Takei say to the attractive Frenchman on waterskis?

Eau myyyyyyyy....

What did the Frenchman say when he saw a dirty toilet?

Eau de Toilette! (eww, the toilet)

How do Frenchmen share files?

Pierre to Pierre.

What did the Frenchman yell on the roller coaster?

Yes!

Why did the Frenchman not want two eggs?

Because one egg is un oeuf.

When does a Frenchman get his morning wood?

A bonne heure.

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How many Frenchmen does it take to guard Paris?

No one knows, it's never been done before

How many eggs does a Frenchman need?

One, because that's an Oeuf.

How did the Frenchman get turned on?

He French-kissed a power outlet

What do you call a Frenchman that's been attacked by a bear?

Claude

Why did the Frenchman not want two eggs for breakfast?

Because one egg is un oeuf.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

How do you sell a chicken to someone who is hard of hearing?

HEY! DO YOU WANT TO BUY A CHICKEN!?!?!

Why did the man throw his watch out the window?

He wanted to see time fly!

Turn Jokes More Turn Jokes

How did Geordi La Forge go blind?

He turned on the UV light in the Holodeck.

Why did the campfire turn into a forest fire?

It wanted to get off its ash.

80 Jokes More 80 Jokes

Why do the French get high so fast?

Because they'll reach 420 before anyone else. Explanation: 80 is quatre-vingt in French and quatre=4 and vingt= 20.

What does a 80 yr old woman taste like?

Depends.

Yell Jokes More Yell Jokes

What did the homeless men yell when they hit each other with cardboard?

Pillow fight!

How many SRSers does it take to change a lightbulb?

None. They wait for the electrician to make a mistake and yell at them for doing it wrong.

Bear Jokes More Bear Jokes

Why did the mother bear ask the baby bear to wear shoes before he ran through the forest?

Because he was barefooted!!!

What was Cher doing before she was born?

She was a preacher.

Defend Jokes More Defend Jokes

Why do you want to learn jujitsu?

Person 1: To defend myself. Person 2: Discipline. Me: My girlfriend keeps stealing my fries.

Why do the Republicans defend the 2nd amendment so hard?

They need it to shoot themselves in the foot.

Redneck Jokes More Redneck Jokes

What's a rednecks favorite part of archaology?

Relative dating

What would be a good dating site for rednecks?

MyHeritage.com

Attack Jokes More Attack Jokes

What do you do when a bird attacks you?

Duck.

What do you call a Frenchman that's been attacked by a bear?

Claude