Goldfish Jokes

What is the most expensive type of fish?

A goldfish! I am not sorry.

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What's the difference between a goldfish and a mountain goat?

Goldfish like to muck around the fountain.

What do you call a fish that's worth a lot of money?

A goldfish!

How did one goldfish get the attention of another goldfish?

He yelled, "A u, fish!"

What's ur emergency?

Goldfish: I forgot Goldfish 911: Forgot what Goldfish: WHO IS THIS Goldfish 911: I DON'T KNOW

Why are rabbits never gold?

How would you tell them apart from goldfish

What's the difference between a goldfish and a goat?

One mucks around in fountains.

What fish is the most valuable?

A goldfish.

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Bake Jokes More Bake Jokes

What's a Brit's favorite baked good?

Cake.

Why did the baker bake more bread?

He kneaded the dough.

Smell Jokes More Smell Jokes

What do you have on?

The man says, "I have a hard on but I didn't know you could smell it."

Why don't Superman's farts smell?

Because krypton gas is odourless.

Goat Jokes More Goat Jokes

What do you get if you insert human DNA into a goat?

Banned from the zoo.

What's the difference between a goat and a kid?

My neighbour isn't unknowingly raising two of my goats.

Emergency Jokes More Emergency Jokes

What's your emergency?

Boy: Hello? I need your help! 911: Alright, What is it? Boy: Two girls are fighting over me! 911: So what's your emergency? Boy: The ugly one is winning.

When can you count on a hamburger in an emergency?

When the chips are down!

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What do you call a werewolf that knows it's a werewolf?

A self-awarewolf.

How do locomotives know where they're going?

Lots of training

Fish Jokes More Fish Jokes

Why did Bill Gates &amp?

Warren Buffett once have me quickly kicked out of a game of bridge? When it was my turn to bid I kept saying, "Go fish".

What has got 8 legs and 1 eye?

2 chairs and a half of a fish.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a weasel and a stoat?

One's weasily recognised - the other's stoatally different

Whats the difference between cats and dogs?

Dogs have owners, cats have staff.

Forget Jokes More Forget Jokes

What do you call it when you grind your teeth because you are bugged you forgot your dental floss?

Flossless compression!

Who forgot his phone charger today?

THIS gu