Helicopter Jokes

What does an helicopter and pants have in common?

They both moust go down in emergency.

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What do you call a helicopter mixed with a rhino?

Well hell-if-i-know!

What do you call a helicopter with a bad paint job?

A patchy gunship

Why wouldn't Pope Pius bless any helicopters when they were first manufactured?

Because whenever one started up, the big blades would go "wop...wop... wop" and the little blades would go "guineaguineaguinea".

What do you call a helicopter with no radar and no windows?

A Helenkelicopter.

How do you spot a terrorist?

They'll freak out when they hear a helicopter

How to you tell a naval officer from and RAF officer on an aircraft carrier?

The naval officer is trying to feed bread to the helicopters!

What do you get if you cross a Rhinoceros, an elephant and a helicopter?

HellIfIknow

What animal is faster than a cheetah?

A cow dropped out of a helicopter.

How many helicopters does it take for White House aides to go play a round of golf?

Depends on how many were photographed.

What do you get when you mix a helicopter and a rhino?

Hell if I know.

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Why couldn't the monk who flew a helicopter understand the monk who flew commercial jets?

Because he was on a higher plane.

What's the difference between a banana and a helicopter?

You can helicopter your banana but you can't banana your helicopter

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What is your secret weapon against terrorists?

We simply reply......Chuck Norris

What do terrorists say to their sister?

H'Isis

Window Jokes More Window Jokes

How do Russians put windows in?

Putin Windows duh.

What is the difference between Windows and the US Goverment?

There is none. All of us hope that the next version will be more stable.

Freak Jokes More Freak Jokes

Why don't blind people go sky diving?

It freaks out the dogs!

How do you call blue cow?

Freak..

Emergency Jokes More Emergency Jokes

Why are women and children evacuated first in an emergency?

So the men can think of a solution in silence.

What's your emergency, sir?

Me: I'm being taken away by ducks! I'm being- 911: Please don't do this, sir M: AbDUCKted! 911: *hangs up*

Pant Jokes More Pant Jokes

What did the pirate say with the steering wheel in his pants?

Arrgh, it's driving me nuts!

Why did the Priest go to Walmart?

Because the little boys pants were half off.

Manufacture Jokes More Manufacture Jokes

How do you know the Statue of Liberty isn't French?

It doesn't have both arms raised. And yes I know the French manufactured the Statue of Liberty and gave it to the United States

What is the main material used in the manufacture of TIE fighters?

TIE tanium

Ill Jokes More Ill Jokes

Why was the russian airforce less superior than their enemies?

Cause their airplanes kept STALIN!! (Ill see myself out...)

Which Norse God consistently uses VPNs?

Ill give you a hint, he remains very low-key.

Feed Jokes More Feed Jokes

Why did your sister feed money to her cow?

Because she wanted to get rich milk.

What pets think about their owners?

A dog: He feeds me, takes care about me, gives me shelter... He is God. A cat: He feeds me, takes care about me, gives me shelter... I am God.