Mozart Jokes

What did Mozart yell when he became a crusader?

Amadeus Vult!

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Why couldn't Mozart find his mentor?

Because he was Haydn

What did Mozart and Beethoven do whilst in the grave?

Decompose

What's Mozart doing?

Decomposing.

What do people call Mozart and Beethoven after they died?

Decomposers

What are Mozart and Beethoven up to these days?

They're both Decomposing

What is Mozart doing right now?

De-composing

Why did Mozart get rid of his chickens?

Because they kept saying "Bach, bach, bach"

What do I get when I raise up a platform to play Mozart?

Amadeus on my dais.

Why did Mozart hate chickens?

Because they all they ever say is Bach! Bach! Bach!

What did Mozart say to the police clerk?

I'll be Bach" hahaha. What do you mean they're different people

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What was Mozart's first movement?

His bowels.

Why have they not found Mozart's body yet?

Because he is Haydn.

Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn!

What do you think Mozart is doing right now?

Decomposing.

What does Mozart put on his front lawn?

Metrognomes

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Grave Jokes More Grave Jokes

What's Beethoven doing in his grave?

He's decomposing.

What is it like, to be standing at the foot of an empty grave, not knowing who will one day be in it?

Unbereavable.

Play Jokes More Play Jokes

Why couldn't Cinderella play soccer?

She always ran away from the ball

Why don't lawyers enjoy playing golf?

Because it's too much like work what with all of the lying involved.

Teacher Jokes More Teacher Jokes

What is the difference between a teacher and a train?

The teacher says, "Spit out your gum," but a train says, "Chew chew!"

What is the difference between a locomotive engineer and a teacher?

One minds the train the other trains the mind.

Yell Jokes More Yell Jokes

How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the F word?

Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell *BINGO*!

What does a flower in a race car yell?

Petal to the nettle!

Decomposer Jokes More Decomposer Jokes

What do you call a zombie musician?

A decomposer.

What do people call Mozart and Beethoven after they died?

Decomposers

Compose Jokes More Compose Jokes

What's the difference between a musician and a dead body?

One composes, the other decomposes...

Why did the fish sink?

This joke composed by my seriously autistic friend Neil, who LOVES jokes) Because it was a brick.

Stab Jokes More Stab Jokes

How did you get malaria from a stab?

Malaryan Steel.

Why do Lannisters hate turtles?

Cause they can't stab them in the back

Bach Bach Jokes More Bach Bach Jokes

Why did Mozart hate chickens?

Because they all they ever say is Bach! Bach! Bach!