Policeman Jokes

Why did the policeman smell bad?

He was on duty.

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What did the policeman say to his stomach?

Your under a vest

What's blue and sits on the toilet?

A policeman doing his duty!

What do you call a policeman with blonde hair?

A fair cop!

What did you say to the policeman who spent eight hours on the Internet?

Oh give it arrest.

What do you call a hotel special that lets policemen stay for two nights for the price of one?

CuNO3!

Why did the policeman stay in bed today?

He was undercover *!*

Why was the policeman in bed?

Because he was an undercover cop

What did the policeman say when he pulled over a nissan?

Nissan Haltima Bonus: What do you call it when a kia pulls up to a red light Kia stoptima

What must a policeman have before searching a rabbits' home?

A search warren!

What did the policeman say when he was told about the large pothole?

I'll look into it.

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Why are you crying after giving me that ticket?

Policeman: It was a moving violation.

How is Daniel Craig a policeman?

He is in Spectre (Inspector)

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Why is Dave Mustaine described as "heavy metal"?

Because he sings lead. (Better read than said.)

What's the difference between organized crime and the government?

Only one of them is organized. Couldn't help but post this. Went to see a former mafia boss today, and that joke was told leading up to him speaking.

Leg Jokes More Leg Jokes

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs inside a volcano?

Anakin Skywalker. (Happy Geek Pride Day!)

What is brown and gray has eight legs and is carrying a large trunk and a small trunk?

A Chihuahua on vacation with an elephant.

Bobby Jokes More Bobby Jokes

Who's there! Bobby! Bobby who?

Bobby-n up and down like this!

Look Jokes More Look Jokes

When your boss asks you "do I look stupid to you?

It's a rhetorical question I know this now

Why did the thoroughbred break up with the wild horse?

Because she was looking for a stable relationship.

Duty Jokes More Duty Jokes

What is a businessman's favorite game?

Call of Duty: Economic Warfare

What's blue and sits on the toilet?

A policeman doing his duty!

Dark Jokes More Dark Jokes

How many light bulbs did it take to screw a human?

None, there not too bright with doing anything except showing us where to go when were lost in the dark

Why did Anakin Skywalker cross the road?

To get to the dark side...

Stomach Jokes More Stomach Jokes

How do you get your stomach pumped?

Swallow a speaker playing "Remember the Name"

What did the food say to the other food, while inside a stomach?

I won't digest yet.

Pokemon Jokes More Pokemon Jokes

What do you call a Pokémon that's part train?

A Pikachoochoo.

Why is it a bad idea to change clothes at a Pokemon's house?

Because he might Pikachu!