Press Jokes

What happened when Santa cut his beard?

The police came and took statements but ultimately Mrs. Claus declined to press charges. OC

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

Why did the can crusher quit his job?

Because it was soda-pressing.

Why can't the hydraulic press guy bring himself to crush a can of sprite?

Because it's soda pressing

Why didn't the weightlifter like doing chest exercises with Coke cans?

Because it was soda pressing.

What happened when the coke bottle was run over by the steamroller?

He was soda pressed.

Why did the soda can quit its job at the vending machine?

It was soda pressing.

Why'd the factory worker hate their job?

Because it was soda pressing.

Why was the Pepsi crying while lifting weights?

Because he was soda-pressing

Why does pushing my finger against a bottle of Pepsi make me sad?

Because it's soda pressing.

How do you know when there's a elephant under your bed?

Your nose is pressed against the ceiling.

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Sprite Jokes More Sprite Jokes

What is a ghost's favorite drink?

Sprite

Why can't the hydraulic press guy bring himself to crush a can of sprite?

Because it's soda pressing

Crush Jokes More Crush Jokes

Why can't the hydraulic press guy bring himself to crush a can of sprite?

Because it's soda pressing

What is it called when your crush has a crush on you too?

Imagination.

Chinese Man Jokes More Chinese Man Jokes

How Long is a Chinese man?

Its his name.

Which one is the odd one out; a Crab, a Tuna, a Chinese man run over by a bus or a Lobster?

A tuna, because the rest of them are crustaceans.

Habit Jokes More Habit Jokes

How many Catholics can you fit in a habit?

Nun

What did the tailor tell the thieving nun when he caught her red-handed?

You better not make a habit out of this.

Oc Jokes More Oc Jokes

What does a cannibal bring to a barbecue?

OC) Brats!

What did the ascetic say when he broke his fast?

OC I think I'll go on a diet!

Crusher Jokes More Crusher Jokes

Why does the can crusher hate his job?

Because it's soda pressing.

Why did the can crusher quit his job?

Because it was soda-pressing.

French Press Jokes More French Press Jokes

Why does ISIS drink instant coffee?

Because they hate French press!

What kind of coffee do terrorists hate?

French press. (Too soon?)

Force Jokes More Force Jokes

What do you call a group of armed nuns enforcing the status quo?

A force of habit

Why does Luke Skywalker never have trouble getting laid?

Because he always uses the force.