Religion Jokes

What do you call a man with no religion?

Godfrey

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What is atheism?

A non-prophet religion Edit: Replace the word "religion" with "set of beliefs" if you're picky about that sort of thing

What religion believes in the Big Bang?

Islam.

What do you call a vegetable/fruit that dies for it's religion?

A Tomartyr

What religion is Santa?

He's egg-nog-stic

Why is religion like mobile gaming?

Free-to-pray, pray-to-win.

Why did religion cross the road?

God is the answer.

What religion do ghosts practice?

Boo-ddhism

How do religions reproduce?

They have sects.

Why don't churches, synagogues, mosques and temples have Wi-Fi?

Because religions don't like competing with an invisible power that actually works.

Which religion faces the most Resistance?

Hinduism... Om......

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What is the difference between a cult and a religion?

Popularity.

Which country's capital apologises for its religion?

Islamabad.

What religion does a drinking feline believe?

Cat-holic

What religion do Saudi Arabian cows follow?

Mooslim

What's the difference between a cult and a religion?

About a couple thousand years.

What do you call 11 people on national television debatting religion?

The Republican presidential candidates.

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What did the drug test say to the addict?

URINE TROUBLE!

What do you call a duck addicted to crack?

A quack head. What is a ducks favorite snack Quackers. Why couldn't the duck drive his car His windshield was quacked.

Cult Jokes More Cult Jokes

What is the difference between a cult and a religion?

Popularity.

What did the Ohioan Satanist say when he arrived to cult?

Ohio Satan!

Big Bang Jokes More Big Bang Jokes

What is your favorite Brian Williams joke?

I was there during the big bang of the universe - Brian Williams

What religion believes in the Big Bang?

Islam.

Priest Jokes More Priest Jokes

What's a priest on an egg called?

A brother

How does a Priest find a little boy in the woods?

Very exciting

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

What does a shooting star say to his buddy before he dies?

Meet me - oh, right..

What did Jay Z say when his friend died?

No Biggie.

Replace Jokes More Replace Jokes

What did the bird say when he flew over K-Mart?

Caw Caw why'd my natural habitat get replaced with 165 000 square feet of consumerist wasteland

How do you always keep your shoes tied?

Replace the laces with earphones.

Cross Jokes More Cross Jokes

Why did the chicken of the sea cross the road?

Because a tuna can!

What do you get when you cross an oven with a car?

A hot rod. NOTE: When I was about 5, I thought this was the funniest joke on earth.

Set Jokes More Set Jokes

What do you get with a room full of 32 Alabamans?

A full set of teeth

What do you get when a Game of Thrones character sets up your photo studio?

Stark lighting.