Install Jokes

What do Microsoft updates and Brock Turner have in common?

They install at night, while you are asleep, without consent.

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How do you install "blackout curtains"?

They just get hammered.

Why does the French Army install Rear-view mirrors in their Tanks?

So that they can see the battle.

Why did the scientist install a knocker on his door?

He wanted to win the No Bell Prize.

What's the first thing you install on a new computer?

The operating system

Why did the tree install solar panels?

It wanted to be a power plant.

Why don't men install urinals in their houses?

Their wives just wouldn't stand for it

Why do Mexicans always install those tiny steering wheels in their cars?

So they can drive with the handcuffs on.

How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years

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Change Jokes More Change Jokes

How many friendzoned guys does it take to change a light bulb?

None, they'll just keep complimenting it and get mad when it doesn't want to screw.

How many Biebers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. There are no light bulbs in the closet. Another one: Why is Justin Bieber so pale? Because there's no light inside the closet

Redditor Jokes More Redditor Jokes

What sits down but doesn't get back up?

A redditor.

How was the Redditor with only one karma upvote able to look like he had five karma upvotes?

He was a karma-karma-karma-karma, karma chameleon!

French Army Jokes More French Army Jokes

Why does the French Army install Rear-view mirrors in their Tanks?

So that they can see the battle.

What do you call an empty field?

The french army at the beginning of a war!

New Computer Jokes More New Computer Jokes

What did the blonde think of the new computer?

She didn't like it because she couldn't get channel 9.

What's the first thing you install on a new computer?

The operating system

Light Bulb Jokes More Light Bulb Jokes

How many kids with ADD does it take to change a light bulb?

Wanna go ride bikes? My all time favorite joke. Sorry if it has already been posted but who has the time to browse all of.

How many Hispanics does it take to change a light bulb..?

Just Juan.

Win Jokes More Win Jokes

What's the best moment of your life?

Me: That time I won a stuffed dino- wife: That didn't involve a dinosaur me: Our wedding

Why did Eli Manning didn't react to the Broncos winning the Superbowl?

Because the fine bros would sue.

Baghdad Jokes More Baghdad Jokes

What did they say about Baghdad after they installed too many garbage cans?

It was Bin Laden

What do Baghdad and Hiroshima have in common?

A. Nothing yet.

Night Jokes More Night Jokes

What did the Agnostic Dyslexic Insomniac do?

He stayed up all night wondering if there was a dog.

Why is the blonde's brain the size of a pea in the morning?

It swells at night.