Lamp Jokes

How many electricians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well, first off, it's called a lamp...

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

What do you get if you cross a lamp with a violin?

You get light music.

What do you call a lamp you send in the mail?

Lamp post

Why don't lamps talk?

They're antisocial lights.

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Restart Jokes More Restart Jokes

How will an IT guy fix a lamp?

He'll restart the nuclear power plant

Whats worse than Bad command or File name?

Windows update message asking you to restart your computer

Sheep Jokes More Sheep Jokes

How do sheep in Mexico say Merry Christmas?

Fleece Navidad!

How do you milk sheep?

With iPhone accessories.

Candle Jokes More Candle Jokes

How do you make a candle really happy...?

Blow it out, it'll be delighted

Why was the candle mad at his friend?

He blew him off.

Send Jokes More Send Jokes

Why do parents send their toddlers to the army for daycare?

Because they're sending them to the infantry!

What do ghosts say when a girl footballer is sent off?

Ban-she ban-she!

Reject Jokes More Reject Jokes

Why did the girl reject iron oxide?

Because it was FeO

What's worse than getting rejected by an attractive stranger?

Getting hit on by an ugly stranger.

Love Jokes More Love Jokes

Why does it smell so bad in Russia?

Everybody loves Putin!

What is Asia's favourite sitcom?

Everybody loves Ramen.

Tie Jokes More Tie Jokes

How did the alien tie his shoes?

With an astroknot.

What do you call an actor from Alabama that is forced by contract to play a certain character in a production?

Role tied.

Need Jokes More Need Jokes

Why don't you see many chemists with master's degrees working with acids and bases?

To really understand acids and bases, you need a pHd.

What do you know when you see three rabbits walking down the street wearing tuxedos and top hats?

You know you need a psychiatrist!