Rub Jokes

Why was there never an Aladdin 4?

Because he kept on rubbing the wrong lamp.

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

$19.99

What happens when you pet a cat in the opposite direction?

You rub them the wrong way

Why did the genie turn the man into a toad?

He rubbed him the wrong way.

What is a guy who rubs bear toes called?

Rob...wait for it... erto! Rubeartoe!

Why was the whiteboard angry with the Eraser?

The Eraser had rubbed the Whiteboard the wrong way.

What is green sooty and whistles when it rubs its back legs together?

Chimney Cricket!

What do you do for a pig with sore muscles?

Rub him with oinkment.

What do you get when you rub two orange juice boxes together?

Pulp friction.

What did the perverted frog say?

Rub-it!

When I was kid, and we'd go sledding on a cold snowy day, Ya know how often I had to rub my hands together to stay warm?

Intermittenly.

What does a frog say when it washes car windows?

Rub it rub it rub it.

Everyday Deserves a Joke

$19.99

You might also enjoy:

Toad Jokes More Toad Jokes

What do you call a frog that is illegally parked?

Toad.

What do you get if you cross a newsreader and a toad?

A croaksman!

Toothbrush Jokes More Toothbrush Jokes

Why is a toothbrush a "tooth" brush?

Cause it was invented in Alabama! Inspiration came from the comments(http://mobile.reuters.com/article/idUSKBN0GP1NS20140825 irpc=932)

Who else does this?

1. wets toothbrush 2. puts toothpaste on toothbrush 3. wets toothbrush again 4. does backflip on to huge pile of money

Frog Jokes More Frog Jokes

Why does Mrs. Piggy douche with honey?

A. Because Kermit the Frog likes sweet and sour pork.

Whats green and can jump a mile a minute?

A frog with hiccups!

Child Jokes More Child Jokes

What did the Buffalo say when his child left for college?

Bison

What do you call it when a Spanish man goes to court for custody of his children?

Fight for your right to padre

Love Jokes More Love Jokes

Why did the SpaceX rocket explode?

Because I don't love you anymore.

What type of music do astronauts love?

Neptunes!

Produce Jokes More Produce Jokes

How did the cow feel when it couldn't produce milk?

Udderly useless.

Why do Klingons feel very little pain?

They produce a lot of endworfins.

Spend Jokes More Spend Jokes

Why are burglars such good tennis players?

Because they spend such a lot of their time in courts!

How does a nihilist propose to his fiancee?

Even though my existence is meaningless I want to spend the rest of it with you.

Opposite Direction Jokes More Opposite Direction Jokes

What happens when you pet a cat in the opposite direction?

You rub them the wrong way