Offer Jokes

Why should you work for a vegetable factory?

Because they offer a good celery.

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

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Why did the Pokemon Company offer me a role in their upcoming TV Series?

So they could Starmie.

How many American golf fans does it take to change a lightbulb?

1001 1 to offer up the bulb and 1000 to scream 'Get in the hole'

Why did you offer me a piece of candy?

Hotel Clerk: You said you wanted the best suite in the hotel.

What did the snake say when offered a piece of cheese?

Thanks I'll just have a sliver!

What do you get if you cross a Sociologist with someone in the Mafia?

An offer you can't understand.

What did one teddy bear say to the other teddy bear when he offered him some dessert?

No thanks, I'm stuffed.

What did the snake say when he was offered a piece of cheese for dinner?

Thank you I'll just have a slither.

How many dentists does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to administer the anaesthetic one to extract the light bulb and one to offer the socket some vile pink mouthwash.

What do you call a cross between... a Mafia Don and post-modernism?

An offer you can't understand.

What do you get when offering a blonde a penny for her thoughts?

Change.

Everyday Deserves a Joke

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How many online courses are offered by the senior learning center?

None. They're old school.

How many American golf fans does it take to change a lightbulb?

1001 1 to offer up the bulb and 1000 to scream 'Get in the hole'

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247 Jokes More 247 Jokes

When's the improper fraction helpline open?

24/7

American Jokes More American Jokes

Why do Americans hate knock knock jokes?

Because Freedom Rings.

What's an American's favourite day of the week?

Fryday.

Conductor Jokes More Conductor Jokes

What's the difference between a teacher and a conductor on the railroad?

One trains the mind the other minds the train.

Why are trains so energetic?

They have Conductors.

Cheese Jokes More Cheese Jokes

What did the milk say to the cheese?

Hey, you're old!

What's better than cheese?

A cheese grater

Israeli Jokes More Israeli Jokes

How do Israeli skiiers greet each other?

Shlalom! (Oy, that's terrible.)

What did the Israelite say to the American when offering him a drink?

Here, try this, Israeli refreshing!

Rubber Jokes More Rubber Jokes

What is, aside from being rubber, the similarity between an old car tire and 365 used condoms?

It was a Good Year...

What did the rubber say when he was offered a job as the high school choir teacher?

I can't, I'm not a conductor.".

Lightbulb Jokes More Lightbulb Jokes

How many Astros fans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Both of them.

How many women does it take to screw a lightbulb?

Only one, but with a perticular FETISH

Ted Kennedy Jokes More Ted Kennedy Jokes

What's the difference between John Kenndy Jr. and Ted Kennedy?

Ted can swim away from an accident.