Offer Jokes

Why should you work for a vegetable factory?

Because they offer a good celery.

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

$19.99

Why did the Pokemon Company offer me a role in their upcoming TV Series?

So they could Starmie.

How many American golf fans does it take to change a lightbulb?

1001 1 to offer up the bulb and 1000 to scream 'Get in the hole'

Why did you offer me a piece of candy?

Hotel Clerk: You said you wanted the best suite in the hotel.

What did the snake say when offered a piece of cheese?

Thanks I'll just have a sliver!

What do you get if you cross a Sociologist with someone in the Mafia?

An offer you can't understand.

What did one teddy bear say to the other teddy bear when he offered him some dessert?

No thanks, I'm stuffed.

What did the snake say when he was offered a piece of cheese for dinner?

Thank you I'll just have a slither.

How many dentists does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to administer the anaesthetic one to extract the light bulb and one to offer the socket some vile pink mouthwash.

What do you call a cross between... a Mafia Don and post-modernism?

An offer you can't understand.

What do you get when offering a blonde a penny for her thoughts?

Change.

Everyday Deserves a Joke

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How many online courses are offered by the senior learning center?

None. They're old school.

How many American golf fans does it take to change a lightbulb?

1001 1 to offer up the bulb and 1000 to scream 'Get in the hole'

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Change Jokes More Change Jokes

How many Librans does it take to change a lightbulb?

Er two. Or maybe one. No --- on second thoughts make that two. Is that okay with you

How does Alabama keep alcohol out of high school?

Change the drinking age to 25

Role Jokes More Role Jokes

What do you give an actor playing the role of an angry street gang member?

Mad props...

What did they tell the most famous child actress from the 30's when she tried to audition for a role in Harry Potter?

Shirley you can't be Sirius.

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

Why can't John complete a workout?

He tried, but it didn't work out.

What do computers and air conditioners have in common?

Neither work when you open windows.

Understand Jokes More Understand Jokes

How do trains from different countries understand each other?

With a trainslator

Why doesn't Dwayne Johnson's downstairs neighbor understand references to current events?

He's been living under The Rock.

Job Jokes More Job Jokes

Why did the concrete fail at its job?

It couldn't take the shear stress

Why do chemists love bad jokes?

Their jobs get a lot easier when there are no reactions

Scream Jokes More Scream Jokes

Whenever I'm bored I stop a stranger and ask "where am I?

And whatever they say I runaway screaming "Hahaha I'm a genius! I can teleport!"

What's stronger, fifty watts of sound or fifty watts of light?

I don't care but would you please stop screaming, turning the lights on and off.

American Golf Fan Jokes More American Golf Fan Jokes

How many American golf fans does it take to change a lightbulb?

1001 1 to offer up the bulb and 1000 to scream 'Get in the hole'

How many American golf fans does it take to change a lightbulb?

1001 1 to offer up the bulb and 1000 to scream 'Get in the hole'

Try Jokes More Try Jokes

What do you call someone who keeps trying to catch your interest even though you already said you're not interested several times?

Windows 10.

How do you find Will Smith in a heavy snow storm?

Try to find the fresh prints