Offer Jokes

Why should you work for a vegetable factory?

Because they offer a good celery.

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

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Why did the Pokemon Company offer me a role in their upcoming TV Series?

So they could Starmie.

How many American golf fans does it take to change a lightbulb?

1001 1 to offer up the bulb and 1000 to scream 'Get in the hole'

Why did you offer me a piece of candy?

Hotel Clerk: You said you wanted the best suite in the hotel.

What did the snake say when offered a piece of cheese?

Thanks I'll just have a sliver!

What do you get if you cross a Sociologist with someone in the Mafia?

An offer you can't understand.

What did one teddy bear say to the other teddy bear when he offered him some dessert?

No thanks, I'm stuffed.

What did the snake say when he was offered a piece of cheese for dinner?

Thank you I'll just have a slither.

How many dentists does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to administer the anaesthetic one to extract the light bulb and one to offer the socket some vile pink mouthwash.

What do you call a cross between... a Mafia Don and post-modernism?

An offer you can't understand.

What do you get when offering a blonde a penny for her thoughts?

Change.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

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How many online courses are offered by the senior learning center?

None. They're old school.

How many American golf fans does it take to change a lightbulb?

1001 1 to offer up the bulb and 1000 to scream 'Get in the hole'

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Scream Jokes More Scream Jokes

How many American golf fans does it take to change a lightbulb?

1001 1 to offer up the bulb and 1000 to scream 'Get in the hole'

Why can't Ewoks yell and scream in the house?

They have to use their Endor voices.

1001 1 Jokes More 1001 1 Jokes

How many American golf fans does it take to change a lightbulb?

1001 1 to offer up the bulb and 1000 to scream 'Get in the hole'

How many American golf fans does it take to change a lightbulb?

1001 1 to offer up the bulb and 1000 to scream 'Get in the hole'

Conductor Jokes More Conductor Jokes

What did the conductor do when half of the cello section called in sick a week before a major concert?

He was forced to resort to excessive violins.

Why did the train get hit by lighting?

Because of the conductor.

Bulb Jokes More Bulb Jokes

How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. 1 to hold the bulb 2 to turn the ladder and 17 to be on the guest list.

How many frat guys does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to make a t-shirt about it.

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

How did the stem cell break it to his girl?

It's not you it's me*iosis* Could probably do with some work on deliver as I made it 5 minutes ago

What do computers and air conditioners have in common?

Neither work when you open windows.

Daesh Network Jokes More Daesh Network Jokes

What satellite TV provider does ISIS use?

Daesh Network

Cheese Jokes More Cheese Jokes

What do you call cheese that's not yours?

Colby Jack's.

What smells of cheese and is filled with holes?

About 100 French people right now

American Jokes More American Jokes

What do you call someone who only speaks one language?

American.

What's an American's favourite day of the week?

Fryday.