Sean Murray and PS4 users
A campaign promise.
Some people say "nothing", but my stock portfolio's looking promising.
Only the tip baby, I promise!
I actually don't know where to post this idea, true jokes maybe?... There has to be a food for thought sub. This is your OP, I promise to deliver!
He brexit.
Mom of kid: We don't believe in sugar. Me: I promise it's real. I've seen it with my own eyes.
Just one more guys I promise.
Satan: Where's the soul that you said you had
Nothing. But he promised he'd make it up to them on the next one.
They promised freaky fast delivery
None--He'll only promise "change."
None, no light bulb dare go out in the presence of Chuck Norris.
Look a squirrel!
Finger food!
Curried.
Because walking wouldn't burn enough calories.
Because doing so would be incense-itive!
Sumday
Getting new shoes every week.
You never can tell. The Sandpeople always ride in single file to hide their numbers.
Two. Ant-Man and Wasp are the only ones small enough to fit inside a lightbulb.
One says, "hey, you! Get off my cloud!", and the other one says, "hey, McCloud! Get off of my ewe!"
One says "hey, you, get off of my cloud", and the other says "hey, McLeod, get off of my ewe".
Three. One to post it, another to post a better punchline in the comment section, and another to repost it with the new punchline.
You push it! I deserve salmonella for even posting this...
Don't Look Now But Something Between Us Smells
He was taking a look around
