Salmon Jokes

Why did the salmon cross the road?

To get to the front page

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?

Salmon

What did the salmon say to his shy Japanese girlfriend?

Don't be koi.

Whats pink and smells like salmon?

Trout

How long did it take the fish to go to the store?

Salmon or eight minutes.

What did a disappointed Arnold Schwarzenegger say when he fished up a Salmon?

IT'S NOT A TUNA!!!

Where does a salmon go to deposit a check?

To the river bank!

What do you call a fish that's on its way to somewhere?

Salmon en route

What did the salmon say when it hit the wall?

Dam

What do you get if you ask a bear to spare some of his salmon?

The Bear Glare.

What do you get when you cross bears with salmon?

Cannibals.

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What happens when you put Nutella on salmon?

You get salmonella

What do you get if you cross a salmon a bird's leg and a hand?

Birdsthigh fish fingers!

What do you call a Salmon that sets a good example?

A roe model.

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Driver Jokes More Driver Jokes

What do you think you're doing driving through that intersection fifty miles an hour?

Driver: My brakes don't work so I was rushing home before I had an accident.

What's worse than being stuck in traffic behind a driver that's vaping?

Realizing that your being intently watched for your reaction to their sic clouds - BEST RECOGNIZE!

Breed Jokes More Breed Jokes

What do you get by cross-breeding a jehovahs witness and an atheist?

Someone who pointlessly knocks on the door.

How much water does a frog need to breed?

Knee-deep! Knee-deep! Knee-deep!

Japanese Jokes More Japanese Jokes

What do you call someone obsessed with Japanese food?

A weeafood

How do Japanese politicians say they got their positions?

With erections.

Check Jokes More Check Jokes

What do you call it when stoners split a check?

High finance.

What's that girl?

Timmy's in the old well L: Arf arf He's dead You sure L: Arf! Okay here's a check for $5K L: ima need cash

Page Jokes More Page Jokes

My older brother always tore the last pages of my comic books, and never told me why.

I had to draw my own conclusions.

What happened when the joke about terrorists got to the front page?

It blew up

Spare Jokes More Spare Jokes

What do you get if you ask a bear to spare some of his salmon?

The Bear Glare.

When do spare parts from Japanese cars start falling out of the sky?

When it's raining Datsun cogs.

River Bank Jokes More River Bank Jokes

Where do fishes keep their money?

In river banks

Where does a salmon go to deposit a check?

To the river bank!

Chant Jokes More Chant Jokes

What did the Gregorian monk say when he was kicked out of the monastery?

Give me one more chants!

What do romantic fish sing to each other?

Salmon-chanted evening!