Yard Jokes

How many feet are in a yard?

4 if you have a dog.

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Who do you call about stray cats walking around your yard?

Brian Setzer

Why does no one want to work in the yard with a carpenter?

Because they take a fence to that.

How do you get a unicorn from neighing in your front yard?

Put it in the back yard.

What's the difference between one yard and two yards?

A fence.

When young Clark Kent was wearing a cape in the yard, who was he pretending to be?

Liberace

How do you keep a dog from barking in your front yard?

Put him in your back yard.

What is it son?

Son: Boys are gathering into our yard! Dad: ...How many boys Son: All of them... Dad: MY MILKSHAKES!

What's the range of an accordion?

Twenty yards if you've got a good arm!

What is the range of a tuba?

Twenty yards if you've got a good arm.

How big do you suppose that fence is?

I reckon that fence is around a yard.

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Scotland Yard Jokes More Scotland Yard Jokes

Why did the ghost work at Scotland Yard?

He was the Chief In-Spectre.

What do you call a detective from Glasgow with three feet?

A Scotland Yard.

Unicorn Jokes More Unicorn Jokes

How do you call a corn that is unique?

A unicorn.

Why can't unicorns play soccer?

Because they don't exist

Road Jokes More Road Jokes

Why did the chicken droid NOT cross the road?

Because it had a bad motivator!

Why did Hillary cross the road?

What difference, at this point, does it make?

Detective Jokes More Detective Jokes

What do you call your friend thats a detective?

Your Sherlock Homie

Which detective investigates electrical crimes?

Sherlock Ohms That's why his partner is called Wattson...

Neigh Jokes More Neigh Jokes

What did the horse get on his oral exam?

A-neigh

How do you get a unicorn from neighing in your front yard?

Put it in the back yard.

Dog Jokes More Dog Jokes

What do you get if you cross a dog with a blind mole?

A dog that keeps barking up the wrong tree!

Which dog can tell time?

A watchdog.

White Man Jokes More White Man Jokes

What do you call a white man surrounded by black men?

Coach

Shop Jokes More Shop Jokes

Where do dock workers like to shop?

Crate and Barrel.

What do you get if you cross a labrador and a tortoise?

A dog that will run to the shop to get your paper and bring back last weeks paper!