Elope Jokes

Why have no melons ever gotten married in Vegas?

Because they can't elope!

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What do you call a cantaloupe who can't elope?

A cantaloupe. The spelling is completely different...

Why was the farmer disappointed when he tried to marry his prized melon?

Because the minister wouldn't marry the two, since a melon can't elope!

Why couldn't the melon couple run off and get married?

Because they can't elope.

Why do melons always have big weddings?

Because they can't elope.

Why do melons have traditional weddings?

Because they can't elope!

Why couldn't the melons get married?

Because they can't elope.

Why were the boy and girl melons depressed?

Because they can't elope.

Why did the melon leave her boyfriend?

He said he can't elope.

Why did the melon break up with her melon boyfriend?

He told her he *can't elope*.

Why can't deer get marred?

Because they can't elope

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Why didn't the melon get married?

Because it can't elope.

Why couldn't the melons secretly get married?

Because they were cant elopes

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Why did people use insulation containing deadly toxins?

It was asbestos they could do at the time!

Why does America use the imperial system?

Because they are behind

Well Jokes More Well Jokes

What is a better name for cows?

Lawn mooers! My 12 year old sister made this up... She out dad joked me..and I'm a dad!

Mar Jokes More Mar Jokes

Why has Venus been so distant lately?

Mars answers "shes been under a lot of pressure and has really bad gas"

Why can't deer get marred?

Because they can't elope

Romeo Jokes More Romeo Jokes

What do Romeo and Juliet have in common with melons?

They both cantaloupe.

Why did Romeo and Juliet break up?

They were in a relationship!

Minister Jokes More Minister Jokes

What do you call a man that marries another man?

A minister! Courtesy of a patient.

Why was the farmer disappointed when he tried to marry his prized melon?

Because the minister wouldn't marry the two, since a melon can't elope!

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How do you tell the difference between an X and Y chromosome?

You pull down its genes.

How can you tell if someone who's having a temper tantrum is on the phone?

You get a tizzy signal!

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

How Do Priests Get High?

Snorting the left over ashes from Ash Wednesday...

Why couldn't the NSA agent leave his house this Winter?

He was Snowden.

Vegas Jokes More Vegas Jokes

Why couldn't the watermelon get married in Vegas?

Because his fiancee is a cantaloupe!

Why didn't the melons get married in Vegas?

Because they cantaloupe. This joke was brought to you by Dads inc.