Forgot Jokes

What does amnesia mean?

Someone told me but I forgot.

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Where can you always find kids by themselves?

Edit: i forgot to say please.

What did the dementia patient say to the other dementia patient?

I forgot.

What's the worst thing about living with Alzheimer's?

I forgot

How did your mom know you hadn't washed your face?

I forgot to wet the soap.

Why was Linda so mad on her wedding day?

Her soon to be husband forgot how to groom.

What's the integral of 1/cabin with respect to cabin?

Person 2: A log cabin! Person 1: No, a houseboat. You forgot to add the C!!

What's the difference between a gun and amnesia?

Oh shoot, I forgot...

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Skeleton Jokes More Skeleton Jokes

How much does a dead elephant weigh?

A skele**ton**.

How do skeletons make a baby?

They bone

Customer Jokes More Customer Jokes

Which format are the images you send?

Customer: "Rectangular 15x11 centimeters."

What does the customer say to the worker as he leaves the store after buying a discounted item?

Good buy.

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How do you know you are dating a women, not a girl?

A girl has no name.

Who threw that?

Gary, was that you Don't act innocent, I know you download music illegally.

Emergency Jokes More Emergency Jokes

What do chefs do when they are cooking in an emergency?

They take drastic measures.

Which positions does a violist use?

First third and emergency.

Crash Jokes More Crash Jokes

What did the hippy who has been crashing on your couch for the last 2 weeks say when you asked him to leave?

Am I supposed to say the answer or let y'all guess for a bit!

Why did the rich guy crash his car?

He wanted to see how the Mercedes bends

Car Jokes More Car Jokes

What's worse than getting dumped by your girlriend?

Getting denied by a car when hitch-hiking.

What kind of car does a pirate drive?

A Yarrrrrrrrris.

Mean Jokes More Mean Jokes

Where were you born?

Me: Missouri. I: What state are you in now? M: Apathy. I: That's not what I meant. M: I don't care.

What I say: "Does anyone need anything from the store?

What I mean: "I'm off to smoke a bowl in my car so I can deal with all of you."

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

Why did my husband die?

Doctor responds: "Heavy drug use, ma'am" Widow: "But doctor, my husband didn't use drugs!" Doctor: "I know, but I did"

Why did the calendar die?

It's days were numbered.