Battle Jokes

Why do they call them the minute men?

Because they lasted a minute in battle

Everyday Deserves a Joke

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What do you call souvenirs from the last battle of the Napoleonic wars?

Wat-heirlooms.

What's the difference between RPGs and Drunken Style Kung Fu?

In the first, you must drink a lot of liquids before battle, but in the latter, you only pretend.

What is amnesia?

Is it: A) memory loss A) memory loss Or 3) The Battle of Hastings

Why did Germany win so many battles in WW I?

They had baron.

What did the armless warrior say to his opponent before battle?

You're about to meet da-feet!

What do you call a battle of wordplay?

Pun-fu fighting

How is the Battle for Hogwarts like a Black Friday sale?

Weasley twins are 50% off

What did General Custer's advisors tell him before the Battle of Little Bighorn?

Don't do it, it's Siouxicide

Why did the twitter army lose all their battles?

Because they kept retweeting.

How did the aquarium win the battle?

Giant Fish Tanks.

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What Does an Angry Sheep Say in Battle?

Fus Ro BAAAAAAAA.

Why were there only 40,000 Mexicans at the Battle of the Alamo?

They only had 2 trucks

What do you call a French General who charged into battle and died?

Napoleon Blownaparte

What do you call it when cows do battle in outer space?

Steer Wars.

Who leads the corn into battle?

The kernal!

What does velcro yell as it charges into battle?

ATTACH!

What's a bodybuilder's favorite fight of the American Civil War?

The Battle of Gaine's Mill

Why are there windows on the back of French tanks?

So they can watch the battle

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What happens when two pastries divorce?

They have a custardy battle

What happens when clowns get divorced?

They end up in a custardy battle.

Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

What do you call a camel in Alaska?

Lost.

What did the Mtis people think of the look on Stephen Harper's face when he lost the election?

They though it was Riel funny!

French Jokes More French Jokes

What do the French call artificial feet for cats?

Faux Paws

What's the difference between In-n-Out Burger French fries and League of Legends?

I can control my salt intake at In-n-out.

Win Jokes More Win Jokes

Why is it good that the Vietnamese man won first place?

It's a Nguyen-win situation.

Why can't Sweden win a race?

Because, it always sits right behind the Finnish line

Black Black Rhyme Jokes More Black Black Rhyme Jokes

Liquid Jokes More Liquid Jokes

What's the difference between RPGs and Drunken Style Kung Fu?

In the first, you must drink a lot of liquids before battle, but in the latter, you only pretend.

What kind of liquid does a pig's printer use?

Oink

Control Jokes More Control Jokes

Why was the teacher cross-eyed?

Because she couldn't control her pupils

Why can't penguins fly?

They're too short to reach the controls of the plane.

Rpg Jokes More Rpg Jokes

What's the difference between RPGs and Drunken Style Kung Fu?

In the first, you must drink a lot of liquids before battle, but in the latter, you only pretend.

Why do rpg characters like potions so much?

Because they're always the life of the party!