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Battle Jokes

Why do they call them the minute men?

Because they lasted a minute in battle

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Why do French tanks have rearview mirrors?

So they can see the battle.

What do Caitlyn Jenner and WWII have in common?

The Battle of the Bulge.

What do you call souvenirs from the last battle of the Napoleonic wars?

Wat-heirlooms.

What's the difference between RPGs and Drunken Style Kung Fu?

In the first, you must drink a lot of liquids before battle, but in the latter, you only pretend.

What is amnesia?

Is it: A) memory loss A) memory loss Or 3) The Battle of Hastings

Why did Germany win so many battles in WW I?

They had baron.

What did the armless warrior say to his opponent before battle?

You're about to meet da-feet!

What do you call a battle of wordplay?

Pun-fu fighting

How is the Battle for Hogwarts like a Black Friday sale?

Weasley twins are 50% off

What did General Custer's advisors tell him before the Battle of Little Bighorn?

Don't do it, it's Siouxicide

Birthday State of Mind

Birthday State of Mind

Who would win a battle between an orangutan and a hyena?

I don't know, but we'll find out November 8, 2016.

Why did the twitter army lose all their battles?

Because they kept retweeting.

How did the aquarium win the battle?

Giant Fish Tanks.

What Does an Angry Sheep Say in Battle?

Fus Ro BAAAAAAAA.

Why were there only 40,000 Mexicans at the Battle of the Alamo?

They only had 2 trucks

What do you call a French General who charged into battle and died?

Napoleon Blownaparte

What do you call it when cows do battle in outer space?

Steer Wars.

Who leads the corn into battle?

The kernal!

What does velcro yell as it charges into battle?

ATTACH!

What's a bodybuilder's favorite fight of the American Civil War?

The Battle of Gaine's Mill

Love Card

Love Card

Why are there windows on the back of French tanks?

So they can watch the battle

Who won the Battle of the Bulge?

The guy with the bulge in his sock...

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Who won the Battle of the Bulge?

The guy with the bulge in his sock...

What do Caitlyn Jenner and WWII have in common?

The Battle of the Bulge.

Wwii Jokes More Wwii Jokes

What do Caitlyn Jenner and WWII have in common?

The Battle of the Bulge.

What do you call a WWII battle that finished it's senior year at communism school?

Leningrad

Germany Jokes More Germany Jokes

Why was Germany in debt after WWII?

The gas bill was too high.

What do you call a hot girl in Germany?

Tourist

Baron Jokes More Baron Jokes

Who's there! Baron! Baron who?

Baron mind who you're talking to!

Why did Germany win so many battles in WW I?

They had baron.

Mirror Jokes More Mirror Jokes

What did the cheese say to itself in the in the mirror?

Halloumi

What did the cheese say when it looked in the mirror?

Haloumi!

Pretend Jokes More Pretend Jokes

What do you call someone pretending to nice to people just to get upvotes?

Karma chameleon

When young Clark Kent was wearing a cape in the yard, who was he pretending to be?

Liberace

Clown Jokes More Clown Jokes

What do you call a clown that gives you flowers?

A Romantic Jester!

How do you stop clowns from attacking you?

Go for the juggler

Drink Jokes More Drink Jokes

What do you call a pirate who is lost at sea and has to drink his own pee to survive?

Aarrrrrrr Kelly!

Why do programmers drink coffee so much?

So they aren't lying when they say they like Java.