Cod Jokes

What did the atheist fisherman say when asked about his catch?

There is no cod

Everyday Deserves a Joke

Why is CoD: Infinite Warfare set in space?

Because no one on earth wants to buy it.

Why should you never take a swordfish out to dinner?

Because you'll get stuck with the bill, and if you don't have money to pay the restaurant will call the cods on you. Fin.

What did the fisherman from Boston say to the magician?

Pick a cod, any cod!

What did the sick fish say when he got sick?

I've cod a cold.

Why is CoD like women?

Search and Destroy.

What did the fisherman say to the card magician?

Pick a cod, any cod!

What did the fisherman say to the magician?

Pick a cod, any cod!

What did the beaver say when he found out his new neighbour was a fish?

Cod dam

Knock Knock. Who's there? Cod! Cod who?

Cod red-handed!

What is the difference between a Portuguese woman and a sea lion?

One of them has shiny bodyhair and smells like cod, the other one is a mammal that lives in the sea.

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

$19.99

What did the fisherman say to the street magician?

Pick a cod, any cod!

What am I herring?

This scampi true! Whale I squid you not Oh cod I can't die Waterboat me You're so shellfish Fin

What do you call it when a soldier gets laid?

Tactical Insertion.* What do you call it when a COD player gets laid *Lies.*

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Sea Lion Jokes More Sea Lion Jokes

What's the difference between a seal and a sea lion?

An ion!

What is the difference between a Portuguese woman and a sea lion?

One of them has shiny bodyhair and smells like cod, the other one is a mammal that lives in the sea.

Boston Jokes More Boston Jokes

Why can't the Maple Leafs have any tea?

Because Boston has all the cups!

What's the best thing from New York City?

The train to Boston

Catch Jokes More Catch Jokes

Why was the man arrested at the farmers' market?

He was caught taking a leek.

What do you call a bread that catches a cold?

Flu-catcher bread

Set Jokes More Set Jokes

What did the set-up say to the punchline?

You're nothing but a joke.

What's black and white and makes a lot of noise?

A panda with a set of drums.

Search Jokes More Search Jokes

What drink did the Karate Master order?

Wa-tah! Haha. I'll leave now... (Sorry if already posted. I searched a little bit but found nothing.)

How do you search and identify for feminist jokes in /r/jokes?

They have a "JOKE" disclaimer tag

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why don't you transport onions by boat?

You don' want your boat to be full of leeks.

Why did the chicken cross the road half-way?

She wanted to lay it on the line.

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

What do women and dog poop have in common?

The older they are the easier they are to pick up.

What do a woman and a grenade have in common?

Pull off the ring and the house is gone.

Portuguese Jokes More Portuguese Jokes

How many Portuguese people can fit on a scooter?

A Brazilian

What is the difference between a Portuguese woman and a sea lion?

One of them has shiny bodyhair and smells like cod, the other one is a mammal that lives in the sea.