Describe Jokes

How would you describe a transistor to a caveman?

Ooga booga baby!

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How did the bad Canadian fisherman describe his only catch of the day?

Aboot this big.

How would you describe the average bully?

Mean.

How would you describe Frankenstein's birth?

Shocking!

Which unit describes the intensity of light in South Africa?

Nelson Candela

How do you describe Neapolitan ice cream to someone?

Your two favorite flavors plus strawberry

How do you describe every gf in one word?

What "c word" describes my girlfriend and why I'm not getting any?

Carpaltunnel

How do you describe Catwoman in one word?

Purrfect

How do you describe a Swede, who's not really a Swede?

Swed-ish.

How do you describe the bears?

Fast and Furious 7

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How would you describe a joke about bones?

Humerus.97

How would Arnold Schwarzenegger describe a sousaphone?

It's not a tuba!

What adjective do you use to describe a bad pun?

Pungent

How do you describe people who tell "I see dead people" jokes?

They have a sixth sense of humor

What television show best describes a mothers virginity?

Lost

Why is Dave Mustaine described as "heavy metal"?

Because he sings lead. (Better read than said.)

How would you describe Al Gore playing the drums?

Algorithm.

What's the best language to describe the hectic holiday shopping season?

Russian

Why does Darkwing Duck wear a mask?

You are a duck. No one could identify you without describing every other duck on earth.

How did the hail stone describe it's life?

It really has a lot of ups and downs

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What is a good way to describe a tailor that refuses to make clothing for nuns?

Non-habit forming

What food describes most men?

Jerky.

When you guys describe me to your families do you use the word tigress?

I'd prefer if you included tigress

How do Freudians describe the human mind?

As a huge ENEMA, I mean huge enigma.....

How would you describe yourself in 3 words or less?

Doesn't follow instructions very well.

What's my type?

Someone who is supportive. Someone who is warm. Someone I can just curl up and relax with. Wait I'm describing my bed again.

How would you describe your past work?

Cut to me picking up coins off sidewalks and taking them to CoinStar -Change management.

How would you describe yourself?

Me: Verbally. But I've also prepared a dance.

How do you describe a hierarchy of police officers with only one word?

Police police police police police police police police police police police.

How would you best describe him?

Me: He looks like a miniature cat

How would you describe the typical Inuit mathematician?

Cold and calculating.

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Gf Jokes More Gf Jokes

How do you describe every gf in one word?

What happened did someone try to break into your house?

Me: No. My gf said we needed to talk

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

What do you get if you cross a woman with a whale?

Your research funding suspended and a severe reprimand from the ethics committee.

Why do women aged 40+ not play hide and seek?

Cause nobody would be looking for them.

Attack Jokes More Attack Jokes

What do you call a soldier that got attacked by mustard gas and pepper spray??

A seasoned veteran

Why won't alligators attack lawyers?

Professional courtesy.

Transistor Jokes More Transistor Jokes

How would you describe a transistor to a caveman?

Ooga booga baby!

Why can't the Transistor drink any more coffee?

Because it keeps Peein' n peein'

Day Jokes More Day Jokes

How did skeletons send each other letters in the days of the Wild West?

By Bony Express.

What do you call a T-Rex that's been weightlifting all day?

Dino-sore

Mum Jokes More Mum Jokes

Why couldn't the spotty cat chase the sheep?

Because her Mum wouldn't leopard be a shepherd

When I was a little boy I asked my mum 'how many is a couple?

She replied 'oh, two or three' Now I know why her marriage didn't last long

Unit Jokes More Unit Jokes

What is the unit of power?

Yes.

Which unit describes the intensity of light in South Africa?

Nelson Candela

South Africa Jokes More South Africa Jokes

Why don't they have any casinos in South Africa?

Because there's too many cheetahs!

Which unit describes the intensity of light in South Africa?

Nelson Candela