Hay Jokes

What did the scarecrow say when asked about his job?

This job isn't for everyone, but hay...it's in my jeans

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Why did the farmer take a bale of hay to bed?

He wanted to feed his nightmares.

What did the cow say to the hay?

I chews you

Why is hay so unreliable?

It keeps baleing

Why did they stop feeding cows the round bales of hay in Texas?

Because they weren't getting a square meal.

Why are round bales of hay illegal?

Because cows can't get a square meal.

What do you get when a Catholic priest baptizes hay?

You get a Christian Bale

What did the city worker say after his first ever pony trek?

I never knew anything stuffed with hay could be so hard!

What is the farmers favorite way to greet someone?

Hay!

What did the cow say to the farmer named Mitch?

Moo Mitch, get out the hay

Why did the woman take a load of hay to bed?

To feed her nightmare.

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Why did the kid punch the bed?

His mother told him to hit the hay.

What does an Italian cow say when he gets an extra delivery of hay to the barn?

That's amorehay!

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Cow Jokes More Cow Jokes

What did the butcher say to the cow?

I love you for your inner beauty.

What is cowhide mostly used for?

Keeping cows from falling apart.

Moron Jokes More Moron Jokes

Hammer Jokes More Hammer Jokes

How did the blind carpenter regain his eyesight?

He picked up his hammer and saw.

Why did Jesus take 3 days to resurrect?

He got hammered with his buddies.

Amish Jokes More Amish Jokes

How many Amish people does it take to change a lightbulb?

A what?

What's the difference between the Amish and a Ferrari?

About 568 horses.

Square Meal Jokes More Square Meal Jokes

Why are round bales of hay illegal?

Because cows can't get a square meal.

Why did they stop feeding cows the round bales of hay in Texas?

Because they weren't getting a square meal.

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Where do people go when they die?

Me: Heaven. 3: I don't want to go there. Me: Why not 3: It's full of dead people.

Why does no one want to work in the yard with a carpenter?

Because they take a fence to that.

Feed Jokes More Feed Jokes

Why did the farmer feed money to his cow?

He wanted rich milk!

What pets think about their owners?

A dog: He feeds me, takes care about me, gives me shelter... He is God. A cat: He feeds me, takes care about me, gives me shelter... I am God.

Heaven Jokes More Heaven Jokes

What do they serve at birthday parties in heaven?

Angel food cake of course!

Why should I let you into heaven?

Me: Once a coworker said "supposably" 7 times in a meeting & I just let her StP: Get in here