Bald Man Jokes

What does a balding man and a tortoise have in common?

Hare loss.

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What did the bald man say when he got a comb for Christmas?

Thanks, I'll never part with it.

What did the bald man say when he got a comb as a gift?

I'll never part with this!

Why is it so hard to get a comb from a bald man?

Because they never part with them

Why did the bald man go outside?

To get some fresh hair!

Why did the bald man draw rabbits all over his head?

From a distance they look like hares!

Who never gets his hair wet in the shower?

A bald man.

Why did the bald man put a rabbit on his head?

Because he wanted a head of hare (hair).

Why did the bald man draw rabbits on his head?

Because from a distance they looked like hares.

Why wouldn't the bald man let anyone use his comb?

He couldn't part with it.

What did the bald man exclaim when he received a comb for a present?

Gee, I'll never part with it!

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Why did the bald man cut a hole in his pocket?

He wanted to run his fingers through his hair.

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How many amateur masochists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one; But it takes a WHOLE E.R. room to extract it afterwards. Double joke! "whole... hole." it's a play on words

Why do fathers take an extra pair of socks when they go golfing?

In case they get a hole in one!

Sell Jokes More Sell Jokes

What do you call it when a sheep sells his wool for money?

Cashearing! (Joke I made up last night at work, so be gentle with me)

Why did the poor man sell yeast?

He wanted to make some doe!

Shower Jokes More Shower Jokes

Why did France really surrender to Germany?

Just thought of this earlier in the shower... Had gas ever since.

Why didn't Natalie Wood take a shower on the boat?

She wanted to wash up on shore

Hare Jokes More Hare Jokes

What do you call it when one rabbit challenges another rabbit to hop across a forty-yard canyon?

A hare dare.

Why did the tortoise get arrested?

Because he got there before the hare.

Comb Jokes More Comb Jokes

What does a barber yell when he plays hide-and-go-seek?

Ready or not, hair I comb!

Why does C. Ronaldo comb his hair every game break?

So it won't get too Messi.

Draw Jokes More Draw Jokes

Why did the bald man draw rabbits on his head?

Because from a distance they looked like hares.

How do you draw an Overwatch character?

You Tracer.

Look Jokes More Look Jokes

Why did the snail draw an "S" on the side of his car?

So that when he drove by people could say, "Look at that escargot!"

Why doesn't Bono like Google?

He still hasn't found what he's looking for.

Arrest Jokes More Arrest Jokes

Why was the lobster arrested?

Because he was always pinching things.

What did the devil get arrested for?

Possession!