Cow Jokes

What kind of cows do you find in Alaska?

Eski-moos!

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Why don't cows ever have any money?

Because the farmers milk them dry!

Knock knock. Who's there? Cows go. Cows go who?

No, cows go moo.

What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef!

Did you hear about the cow who jumped over the barbed wire fence?

It was udder destruction.

What do you call a cow on a trampoline?

A milk shake!

What kind of magic do cows believe in?

MOODOO.

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Moo Jokes More Moo Jokes

What is the definition of "moon"?

The past tense of "moo"!

What Does A Ghost Cow Say?

Moo!

Cow Culator Jokes More Cow Culator Jokes

How do bovines do math?

They use a cow-culator! Ba-dum-tsss!

How do you count cows?

You use a cow-culator. Or you round them up. Or any other method the commenters want.

Fall Jokes More Fall Jokes

What do you get when you foot falls asleep?

Coma-toes.

What did the Mexican say when the house fell on him?

Ayyyy watch it homes!

Leg Jokes More Leg Jokes

What has two legs and red all over?

Half a puppy... I'm sorry

What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs?

Matt. No arms and no legs in a swimming pool? Bob.

Earthquake Jokes More Earthquake Jokes

What did one mountain say to the other mountain after an earthquake?

It's not my fault.

What did the earthquake say to the tornado?

It's not my fault.

Dad Jokes More Dad Jokes

What does a National Geographic magazine or a JC Penney catalog have in common?

Sorry, the punchline is the joke. If you don't get it, ask your dad.

How can you tell when Halloween is coming too soon?

The sight of premature Ejack-o-lanterns in the neighborhood. I'm a Dad so this joke is OK

Joke Jokes More Joke Jokes

Why Is Chemistry Racist?

It's very selective. Edit. My first time making a joke. I know I can't make a joke. This is not directed at anyone.

What did the guy who liked mustard say when he opened his fridge and saw no mustard?

You mustard be joking!

2 Leg Jokes More 2 Leg Jokes

What's mostly red and has 2 legs?

Half of a cat.

What do you call a dog with 2 legs?

Snoop Dogg.