Forest Jokes

What does a mathematicion find in a forest?

A natural log.

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What do you need to poop in the forest?

Toiletries

How do really crazy people get through the forest?

Via the psycho path.

What is the wettest animal in the forest?

The raindeer.

What's the difference between Gordon Ramsey and a run in the forest?

Ones a pant in the country the others a...

What did the lumberjack say to the trees?

Run, Forest, run!

Where would you find more Leifs than in a forest?

Valhalla.

Why did the mother bear ask the baby bear to wear shoes before he ran through the forest?

Because he was barefooted!!!

Why does the forest stink during a storm?

Because the trees break wind.

How does an insane man get through the forest?

By taking the psychopath. hhhhehehhehe good one right? yeh? no..? ok.

How far can you walk into the forest?

Halfway, when you walk further then you will walk out of the forest!

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How does Luke Skywalker get through the forest?

Ewoks

What does Johnny Depp yell when a tree falls in the forest?

Timbuuuuuurrrrrrrrton!

How do spies send secret messages in a forest?

By moss code.

Which film star is always jumping around the forest?

John Treevaulter.

How Do Crazy People Go Through The Forest?

They Take The Psycho Path

Why was the ladybird kicked out of the forest?

Because she was a litter bug.

What do you call a fallen tree in a forest?

Natural log. Sorry about the math joke.

When two bears asked a pastor to marry them in the forest, what did he say?

Hold on, let me get my bear rings.

What is the poorest tree in the forest?

The burr-oak tree.

Why did Hugh Jackman single handedly stop a Franciscan botanist from accidentally dropping a match in the forest?

Because only Hugh can prevent florist friars.

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What do you call a man of high authority, stoned out of his mind strolling along in the forest?

Hiking

What do you call an agreement between forests?

A treety

Which way do insane people take when they go through the forest?

The psycho path.

How does a crazy person walk through the forest?

He takes the psychopath.

How do crazy people make it through a forest?

They take the psycho-path.

What did the doe say as she came out of the forest?

I'll never do that for 5 bucks again.

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Country Jokes More Country Jokes

Who's Becky, Stan?

She's just a country!

What's a Mexicans favorite game?

Cross country.

Wolf Jokes More Wolf Jokes

Why do they call a wolf a wolf?

Because it goes wolf!

What is a wolf's favourite dance move?

The Shuffle... pack of wolves.

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What do bees do if they don't want to drive?

Wait at the buzz stop.

What's a blonde's favourite wine?

"Daaaddy I want to go to Miaaami!"

Storm Jokes More Storm Jokes

What do you call a Cloyster that wants to learn the move Rain Dance?

The clam before the storm!

Why do they call them thunder storms and not lightning storms?

Thunder storms just *sound* better

Walk Jokes More Walk Jokes

How are women and linoleum floors alike?

You lay them right the first time and you can walk all over them for the next 20 years.

Why the long face?

A horse walks into a bar. Bartender: why the long face? Horse: because I'm a raging alcoholic.

Run Jokes More Run Jokes

What do you call a dog with a stain on his fur?

Spot. What do you call a dog who lays on a golf course Ruff. What do you call a dog who just got run over Rhody.

Why did the orange stop rolling down the hill?

It ran out of juice. I shall take my leave now.

Wear Jokes More Wear Jokes

What does a bald elephant wear for a toupee?

A sheep.

Why do Italians wear gold chains?

So they know where to stop shaving.

Valhalla Jokes More Valhalla Jokes

Where would you find more Leifs than in a forest?

Valhalla.

What did the Norse goddess say to Thor when he drunk dialed her?

I aint no Valhalla back girl.