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Medicine Jokes

Where do Amish people go to get medicine?

To the farmacy.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

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What kind of medicine do you give a kid having a fit?

An anti-hissy-tamine.

What kind of medicine do Ants use when they have eye problems?

Ant-Eye Biotics (Dad joke, I know)

What do you call alternative medicine that works?

Medicine.

Why do pigs run from medicine?

They hate getting cured.

Why didn't the guy with ADHD take his medicine?

He forgot.

What kind of medicine do bears take?

Bayer Asprin

What did the head trauma patients do when the price of medicine went up?

They went on stroke.

Why does your little brother jump up and down before taking his medicine?

Boy: Because he read the label and it said 'shake well before using.'

Why did Dracula need medicine?

Because he was coffin.

What medicine would you give an ill ant?

Antibiotics!

Everyday Deserves a Joke

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Everyday Deserves a Joke

What did people start calling the medical school that allowed animals to study medicine?

The hippocampus.

What kind of medicine does Dracula take for a cold?

Coffin medicine.

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Stomach Jokes More Stomach Jokes

How do you get your stomach pumped?

Swallow a speaker playing "Remember the Name"

Why was the lions stomach enormous?

Because he finally swallowed his pride

Little Bit Jokes More Little Bit Jokes

Why do black's have white skin on the bottom of their feet and the palm of their hands?

Everyone needs a little bit of good inside them.

Why do black people have white hands and feet?

Because everyone has a little bit of good in them.

Fit Jokes More Fit Jokes

How can you tell your boyfriend has gained weight?

You fit into his clothes.

What shoe can fit 206 million feet in it?

Honshu!

Deal Jokes More Deal Jokes

Why did the Chinese Government cross the road?

THE PUNCHLINE OF THIS JOKE HAS BEEN CENSORED BY THE GOVERNMENT OF THE PEOPLES REPUBLIC OF CHINA, PLEASE REMAIN CALM WHILE WE WILL DEAL WITH THE OP IN A CIVIL MANNER.

Why is there no scope for dealers/middle men in the field of extractive metallurgy?

Because he/she who smelt it, dealt it.

Guy Jokes More Guy Jokes

What did the woman say to the guy in Naval intelligence?

You really have a smart uniform.

What did the lead singer of The Prodigy say to the guy parking his Mini Cooper?

Back my Smitch Up!

Africa Jokes More Africa Jokes

Where'd you get it?

Africa," says the parrot.

How many seconds are there in a day in Africa?

Seconds? They barely get firsts!

Adhd Jokes More Adhd Jokes

How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a light bulb?

Lets go play on our bikes.

Why didn't the guy with ADHD take his medicine?

He forgot.

Point Jokes More Point Jokes

Why is there no point in sending medicine to Athiopia?

Because the instructions usually say: "Take after meals."

What is the difference between arguing with a knife and arguing with your girlfriend?

The knife has a point.