Mexican Jokes

What do they call the fairy in the Mexican version of Peter Pan?

Taco Bell.

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What do Mexicans play at their funerals?

Another Juan Bites The Dust

What did Johnny Cash say to the waitress after he got sick at a Mexican restaurant?

I've bean everywhere, ma'am!

Why do Mexicans make refried beans?

Ever heard of a Mexican doing something right the first time

What is a Mexicans favorite band?

Hispanic at the Disco

What did the Mexican student say when he was asked to turn in his essay?

I ain't no snitch.

Why did the Mexican push his wife off the bridge?

Tequila

What hat does a Mexican wear to a funeral?

A somber-ero.

What did the little Mexican boy get for Christmas?

My bike.

What did the Mexican fireman name his 2 children?

Jose and Hose B

What do you call a Mexican fighter pilot?

Air Force Juan.

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What do you get when you cross a moose with a Mexican?

A Mexican moose

What did the Mexican-American say when two houses landed on him?

Get off me holmes!

What do you call a Mexican garden hose in Canada?

Joseh

What does an elderly Mexican have?

Senority

What do you call a Mexican melon?

A cantelopez! Came up with this on all by myself. I'm a new Dad, so I feel as if I've significantly leveled up my Dad Joke ability.

Why were there only 1,000 Mexicans at the Alamo?

They only had 2 trucks

What do you call a Mexican Disney Princess?

A Taco Belle.

What would Obi Wan be called if he were Mexican?

Obi Juan Kenobi.

Why did the SJW hate the Mexican robot?

Because it was Pablo-matic

What is an alcoholic Mexican's favorite book?

Tequila Mockingbird

$Your Age Is Only Math$

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Why do Mexicans hate cooking pasta?

When they boil the water, they always have to add that *pinche* salt.

What do you call your Mexican crush?

Juan Andonle

Why did the Mexican guy rob a train?

He had a loco motive.

Did you hear about the Mexican train killer?

He had loco motives

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Run Jokes More Run Jokes

What do you get when you run a canary over with the lawnmower?

Shredded tweet.

What did the kitty say when it ran for mayor??

Now, that was one politi-cat debate!

Body Jokes More Body Jokes

Why do Chihuahuas have such short necks?

Because their heads are so close to their bodies!

Why wasn't the Achilles invited into the body?

Because it was already attendin'.

Moon Jokes More Moon Jokes

What do you call a terrorist on the moon?

A problem. What do you call when 3 terrorists are on the moon? A problem. What do you call when all the terrorists are on the moon? A solution.

Why did the Chihuahua laugh?

The cow jumped over the moon.

Bunch Jokes More Bunch Jokes

What do you call a moving company owned by cows?

A bunch of moooovers.

What do you call it when a bunch of stoned poets overthrow the government?

A Haiku.

Tattoo Jokes More Tattoo Jokes

What do you call a pretty lady on the arm of a drummer?

A Tattoo.

What's the difference between Mexicans and Jesus?

Jesus didn't have tattoos of Mexicans all over body

Moscow Jokes More Moscow Jokes

What language do fast talkers from Moscow speak?

Ian!

Where do Russians get their milk from?

From Moscow

America Jokes More America Jokes

Why doesn't Mexico ever do well in the Olympics?

Because every Mexican that can run, jump, or swim is already in America.

Who will be rescued?

America.

Let Jokes More Let Jokes

Why is Elsa not allowed a balloon?

Because she'll let it goooo

What do beekeepers say when they go to work?

Alright, let's get down to beeswax!