Tumblr Jokes

Where do Tumblr users go to pray?

The Cis-Teen Chapel

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Why aren't Tumblr users good farm contractors?

Because they always take a fence

What did the square of cloth identify as on tumblr?

Nap-kin

What do you get when you mix triangles with Tumblr?

Trigger-Nometry

Why do people in tumblr like quantum computing?

Because it's non binary

What is Tumblr's least favourite show?

NCIS

What is the biggest gender on Tumblr?

Whale-Kin

What does Darth Vader identify as on Tumblr?

Ana-kin

What dries your clothes but can also make you writhe around in agony?

A tumblr.

What do you call a Tumblr user who identifies as a device which inflates a tire?

A pumpkin!

What's the name of the car of a hipster Batman?

Tumblr.

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How can you tell if you bought lube from Tumblr?

Because it Lubri-Can't Even!

Why does Tumblr hate symmetrical shapes?

Because they can't even

What is Kanye West's favourite kind of omelette?

Omeletteyoufinish -stolen from raininginreverse on tumblr.

Why is Tumblr so odd?

Because they can't even.

What do you call a sleepy Tumblr user?

Napkin.

Why does the lemon feel uncomfortable making friends outside of tumblr?

Because it has cis-trust issues

What kind of jeans does Mario wear?

Denim denim denim.(http://youtu.be/rdnTvgK2o5I) shamelessly stolen from tumblr

What's the difference between tumblr and a gun?

The gun has only one trigger

Why did the Tumblr user get cut up on Halloween?

She identified as pump-kin.

What is Tumblr's favourite branch of maths?

Trigger-nometry...

$Your Age Is Only Math$

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Device Jokes More Device Jokes

What's the difference between a USB and the USA?

One connects to all your devices and accesses your data, the other is a harware standard.

What do you call a Tumblr user who identifies as a device which inflates a tire?

A pumpkin!

Agony Jokes More Agony Jokes

What dries your clothes but can also make you writhe around in agony?

A tumblr.

Fish Market Jokes More Fish Market Jokes

What did the blind man say when he walked into the fish market?

Good morniiiiiiing ladies!

What does the blind say when he walks past the fish market?

Hello ladies.

Mix Jokes More Mix Jokes

What do you get when you mix a mouse with some laundry detergent?

Squeaky clean clothes.

What do you get when you mix two chains and a cow?

Truuuuuuuuuuu-moooooooooooooooooo!!!

Cloth Jokes More Cloth Jokes

What did one bolt of cloth say to the other bolt of cloth after hurting its feelings?

I'm sari.

What do maids in Manhattan use to clean their kitchens?

J-lo Cloths

Drug Jokes More Drug Jokes

Why do drugs for small dogs have to be tested on larger ones first?

All canine drugs must be lab tested before their public release.

What drug did the mathematician do?

Math Salts.

Fence Jokes More Fence Jokes

What's brown and runs around your garden?

Your fence.

What's the difference between a fence and a wall?

I give them a wall, and they take offense.

Trigger Nometry Jokes More Trigger Nometry Jokes

What do you get when you mix triangles with Tumblr?

Trigger-Nometry

What are feminists best at in mathematics?

TRIGGER-nometry