Tumblr Jokes

Where do Tumblr users go to pray?

The Cis-Teen Chapel

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

Why aren't Tumblr users good farm contractors?

Because they always take a fence

Why do people in tumblr like quantum computing?

Because it's non binary

What is Tumblr's least favourite show?

NCIS

What does Darth Vader identify as on Tumblr?

Ana-kin

What dries your clothes but can also make you writhe around in agony?

A tumblr.

What do you call a Tumblr user who identifies as a device which inflates a tire?

A pumpkin!

What's the name of the car of a hipster Batman?

Tumblr.

How can you tell if you bought lube from Tumblr?

Because it Lubri-Can't Even!

Why does Tumblr hate symmetrical shapes?

Because they can't even

What is Kanye West's favourite kind of omelette?

Omeletteyoufinish -stolen from raininginreverse on tumblr.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Why is Tumblr so odd?

Because they can't even.

What do you call a sleepy Tumblr user?

Napkin.

Why does the lemon feel uncomfortable making friends outside of tumblr?

Because it has cis-trust issues

What kind of jeans does Mario wear?

Denim denim denim.(http://youtu.be/rdnTvgK2o5I) shamelessly stolen from tumblr

What's the difference between tumblr and a gun?

The gun has only one trigger

Why did the Tumblr user get cut up on Halloween?

She identified as pump-kin.

What is Tumblr's favourite branch of maths?

Trigger-nometry...

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Lube Jokes More Lube Jokes

What do ghosts use for lube?

Rectoplasm...

How can you tell if you bought lube from Tumblr?

Because it Lubri-Can't Even!

Square Jokes More Square Jokes

Why do dogs run in circles?

Because it's harder to run in squares.

What did the square say to the blob?

You're out of shape.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What did the calculus teacher tell the crew of his submarine while they were diving?

Derive, derive, derive!

What do you call a snowman who cons people?

A snowfake.

Nap Kin Jokes More Nap Kin Jokes

What is in common between a napkin and a person?

If you sleep with a person, he/she is ur nap-kin.

What do you call a tired tumblrina?

A nap-kin.

Girl Jokes More Girl Jokes

What do you call a girl between two posts?

Annette.

What do you call a girl with a frog in her hair?

Lily!

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

What is something you can use to find the pH of tree sap?

A log!

How does a boat captain determine his profit?

By using aquadratic equation. (Via my coworker)

Mix Jokes More Mix Jokes

What do you get when you mix a car and a refrigerator?

A car-brrrrr-etor

What do you get when you mix a rat and an elephant?

Who cares? It's a relephant.

Pumpkin Jokes More Pumpkin Jokes

Why was Cinderella bad at basketball?

Because her coach was always a pumpkin.

What's with the knives?

Wait, stop. Please stop!" - pumpkin