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Bolt Jokes

What does a robot do after a one night stand?

He nuts and bolts

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

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I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

What does a robot do at the end of a one night stand?

He nuts and bolts.

Why is the robot good at one night stands?

Because he nuts and bolts.

What did the bolt say to the nut?

Washer? I don't even know 'er!

How does Frankenstein sit in his chair?

Bolt upright.

What do you call a robot that doesn't support his children?

Nuts and bolts

What did one bolt of cloth say to the other bolt of cloth after hurting its feelings?

I'm sari.

What did the handyman do... when he got his girlfriend in bed with him for the first time?

He screwed, nutted, and bolted.

Why did the bolt in the ceiling have to go to therapy?

Because it was screwed up!

What does a mechanic do for a one night stand?

He nuts and bolts.

What do robots do on a one night stand?

He nuts and bolts

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What do you if there is a black out?

Make sure your doors are locked and windows bolted shut.

What do you call a one night stand with a robot?

Nut and bolt

What does a mechanic do during a 1 night stand?

He screws, nuts, and bolts

What's the difference between a nail, a screw, and a bolt?

A girl raises her hand and says, "I don't know. I've never been bolted before."

Why do robots make bad boyfriends?

They just screw, nut, then bolt.

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Cloth Jokes More Cloth Jokes

What did the square of cloth identify as on tumblr?

Nap-kin

What do maids in Manhattan use to clean their kitchens?

J-lo Cloths

Bus Jokes More Bus Jokes

What do you do when two lesbians make out in front of you in a bus?

You get off.

What's the worst thing you can hear while taking the bus?

ALLAHUUUUUU AKBARRRR

Wait Jokes More Wait Jokes

How many computer programmers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Oh, wait. That's a hardware problem.

How do you make an internet addict wait?

I'll tell you later.

Mom Jokes More Mom Jokes

What do you call a kid who's dad is Jamaican and mom is Chinese?

Rastafriedrice

What do you call... A cow with one leg?

Lean beef What do you call a cow with no legs Ground beef What do you call a cow with two legs Your mom

Child Jokes More Child Jokes

What will they name their child?

Donald Dump

What did the child with no hands get for his birthday?

Nobody knows yet.

Nuts & Jokes More Nuts & Jokes

Why do the Gorillas like Jimmy Carter?

They don't really know - but they're NUTS about him!

Why do robots make bad lovers?

Nuts &amp bolts!

Runner Jokes More Runner Jokes

What do you call a race where all the runners have no legs?

An arms race.

Why are most runners single?

At best they're ASICS.

Nut Jokes More Nut Jokes

What did one ovary say to the other one?

Did you order any furniture?" "No. Why?" asked the other. "Cause there's two nuts out there trying to deliver an organ."

What did the irritated man say to his inguinal hernia?

Get off my nuts!" (ps. I made this joke up yesterday... i am having hernia surgery tomorrow, and i lol'd so hard at myself that i about caused a second one to pop out)