Haunt Jokes

How did the haunted house escape foreclosure?

It was repossessed

Everyday Deserves a Joke

Everyday Deserves a Joke

How can you tell when a bar is haunted?

It's full of Boo's and Spirits.

What do you call a dead fowl that is haunting you?

A Poltergeese!

What gives a ghost the right to haunt people?

A haunting license

Why did the ghosts haunt the bar?

For the boos.

Why did the French chef quit working at the haunted restaurant?

He got crped out.

What do you call a dead chicken that's haunting your house?

A poultrygeist

Why did the haunted house not like rain?

Because it dampened his spirits.

What do you call a group of goose haunting you?

A poltergeest

What did the homeowners of house haunted by windows have?

Phantom panes.

Why are all liquor stores haunted?

Because they're full of spirits.

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

What do you call the ghost of a chicken that haunts people in their homes?

A poultry-geist.

Where would you take a ghost for lunch?

Pizza Haunt!

Why are haunted houses so noisy in April?

That's when the ghosts do their spring screaming!

What do you call ghosts that haunt liquor stores?

Spirits

What do you mean the school must be haunted?

Daughter: Well the principal kept going on about the school spirit.

What do you call a chicken haunting your house?

A Poultrygeist!

What do you call a ghost who only haunts the Town Hall?

The nightmayor.

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Repossess Jokes More Repossess Jokes

What happens when you don't pay your exorcist?

You get repossessed.

How did the haunted house escape foreclosure?

It was repossessed

Lot Jokes More Lot Jokes

Why did Lot leave his wife?

She became salty.

What do you have to know to be an auctioneer?

Lots

Window Jokes More Window Jokes

How many I.T. workers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, just upgrade to windows

Why was windows 10 afraid of windows 7?

Because windows 7 8 9.

Homeowner Jokes More Homeowner Jokes

What did the homeowners of house haunted by windows have?

Phantom panes.

What did the homeowner say to the fruit growing gardener?

Water me lawn

People Jokes More People Jokes

What is literally the most important fact you'll ever learn, that will totally blow your mind?

That people exaggerate.

Where do people go for pasta related crimes?

A PENNEtentiary!

Creepy Jokes More Creepy Jokes

What did the creepy scientist say to his new creepy wife?

Let's grow MOLD together!

Why was the haunted mansion self conscious?

Because it got a lot of creepy stairs. FML.

Afford Jokes More Afford Jokes

What is the meaning of afford?

It's the car most sales representatives drive.

How could the dolphin afford to buy a house?

He prawned everything!

Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

What happened to the dog that ate nothing but garlic?

His bark was much worse than it's bite!

How'd you sleep last night?

Son says: "umm... With my eyes closed " Edit: This actually happened btw. Probably funnier irl.