Carpet Jokes

What is a snowman's favorite kind of carpet?

BRRR BRRR

Couple's Daily Question Mug

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What's the difference between Java and JavaScript?

Java and JavaScript are similar in the same way car and carpet are.

Why when you spill red wine on a carpet do you take the stain out with white wine?

Because more alcohol is the solution to all problems.

What do you call it when a dog craps on your rug?

Carpet bombing.

What type of carpet do you put in an igloo?

Burr-burr

What do you call a skinned, animal-throwrug for your vehicle?

A carpet.

What do you call a Pixar film about Carpets?

A Rug's Life.

What did the Mexican put under his carpet?

Underlay! Underlay!

What do you call a cute little animal you keep in your automobile?

A carpet.

What did Shakespeare say when his dog messed up the carpet?

Out, damned spot! Out, I say!"*

What do Mexican's put under their carpet?

Underlay

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What did the carpet say to the floor?

Don't move -- I've got you covered.

Why did the moth nibble a hole in the carpet?

He wanted to see the floor show!

What do you get when you put a car and a pet together?

Carpet!

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What's the difference between a weasel and a stoat?

One's weasily recognised - the other's stoatally different

What is the difference between pick and choose?

To pick is to make a selection... And choose are what Cubans wear on their feet.

Rug Jokes More Rug Jokes

What does a carpet salesman give his wife for Valentine's Day?

Rugs and kisses!

What do you call it when a dog craps on your rug?

Carpet bombing.

Sound Jokes More Sound Jokes

What sound does a Filipino horse make when it gallops?

Tagalog-tagalog-tagalog-tagalog.

What's the hardest thing about being an audiophile?

Convincing the sound to get into your van.

Life Jokes More Life Jokes

What is life like for a wood worm?

Boring!

Why do rpg characters like potions so much?

Because they're always the life of the party!

Carpet Bombing Jokes More Carpet Bombing Jokes

What do you call it when a dog craps on your rug?

Carpet bombing.

Crap Jokes More Crap Jokes

What do you call a coffee made with frothy milk that tastes like crap?

A farte

What did the fisherman say to the sewage management person?

Would you pull that crap with a net?

Walk Jokes More Walk Jokes

What do you call 2 ducks who walk like, act like, and believe they are geese?

A paradux

What has two eyes but can't see, two wings but can't fly, and two legs but can't walk?

A dead bird.

Solution Jokes More Solution Jokes

What do you call an equation with no solution?

A hypocrite.

Why are women and children evacuated first in a disaster?

So we can think about a solution in silence