Bach Jokes

Why did Beethoven get rid of his chickens?

All they said was, Bach, Bach, Bach

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Who was the chicken's favorite musician?

Bach.

What's a tree's favourite composer called?

Bach

Why couldn't Bach be a rapper?

Because he's Baroque.

What did The Terminator say when he was invited to a music themed fancy dress party?

I'll be Bach.

What did the musician say when he went back in time?

I'll be Bach.

Who is a chicken's favorite composer?

Bach

What did Arnold Schwarzenegger say to Beethoven on the way to the fancy dress party?

I'll be Bach

Why did Mozart hate chickens?

Because they all they ever say is Bach! Bach! Bach!

Why did the composer go to the chiropractor?

Because he had Bach problems

Why couldn't Bach pay for his dinner?

Because he was Baroque.

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What did Mozart say to the police clerk?

I'll be Bach" hahaha. What do you mean they're different people

Why can't Bach play the piano?

He "Baroque" his arm, and also he's dead.

What do you tell a conductor when they lose control of their orchestra?

Go Bach and get a Handel on it!

Who's there! Bach! Bach who?

Bach to work!

Why did Bach have to sell his organ?

Because he was baroque.

Why couldn't C.P.E. Bach find his contemporary?

He was Haydn.

What did Arnold Schwarzenegger say when invited to the musician themed costume party?

I'll be Bach

What was Arnold Schwarzenegger's answer when asked which historical person he would like to play in a movie?

I'll be Bach.

Which member of the Bach family went to prison?

Bachgen Drwg. (it's Welsh)

What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-bachs.

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What did Schwarzenegger say when deciding which composer to be for Halloween?

I'll be Bach.

What did The Terminator say when he decided to take up piano?

I'll be bach.

What did the musician say to his wife when he went out to the supermarket?

I'm going Chopin, I'll be Bach in a minuet.

What did the famous musician say the moment he was born?

I'LL BE BACH*

What did Arnold Schwarzenegger say when he and his friends decided to dress up as famous composers for Halloween?

I'll be Bach

What do you get if Bach falls off a horse but has the courage to get on again and continue riding?

Bach in the saddle again.

Why didn't Bach buy his wife a new accordion?

He couldn't afford it; he was "Baroque".

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How do you get rid of pubic lice?

Seriously, it is not a joke. I really want to know.

How does a mathematician get rid of constipation?

He works it out with a pencil.

Reincarnate Jokes More Reincarnate Jokes

What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-bachs.

Did you hear about the Viking who was reincarnated?

He was Bjorn again

Baroque Jokes More Baroque Jokes

What sound does a Baroque chicken make?

Bach Bach Bach Bach

Why did Rembrandt lose his house?

Because he was *Baroque*.

Music Jokes More Music Jokes

What type of music do lightning bolts listen to?

Rock and Roll

Whats Wolverine's favorite genre of music?

Metal.

Pay Jokes More Pay Jokes

What happened to the Christian family when they didn't pay their exorcist?

THEIR HOUSE GOT REPOSSESSED!

What's the difference between garbanzo beans and chickpeas?

I've never paid $200 to have a garbanzo bean in my mouth.

Mozart Jokes More Mozart Jokes

What are Mozart and Beethoven up to these days?

They're both Decomposing

What was Mozart's first movement?

His bowels.

Chicken Jokes More Chicken Jokes

What do you call a clan for chickens?

Coo clucks clan

How do ghosts like their chicken cooked?

Terri-fried!

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

What is the best stand-up routine of our time?

I nominate Chris Rock's Never Scared.

What time is our movie tonight?

Me: 7:30. It's 2 hours 50 minutes Hub: WHAT! I CANT STAY UP TILL 10:30 "Back off ladies. He's mine"