Brick Jokes

What is red and bad for your teeth?

A brick.

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Which is faster to unload, a truckload of bricks or a truckload of dead kittens?

Dead kittens. Can't get a pitchfork into the bricks.

What do you call it when you tie a brick to a jar of Miracle Whip and throw it into the ocean?

Sink-o de Mayo

What's the difference between a brick and an MRA?

Bricks get laid.

Why did the man build his house out of a tree instead of bricks?

Because he thought it wood look better!

What's the difference between me and a pile of bricks?

The bricks will get laid.

What is red and hurts when you bite it?

A Brick.

What's the difference between you and a brick?

Bricks can get laid.

What did the brick say to the rock?

Nothing, it's just a brick, what's wrong with you.

How many bricks do you need to screw in a lightbulb?

Just two, but you're going to need a lot of patience and light bulbs.

What's the difference between OP and a brick?

A brick gets laid!

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What's the best thing about owning a car in Liverpool?

You'll eventually end up with enough bricks to build a free garage.

What is the difference between a Windows Phone and a brick?

One is a brick and the other is a brick with a screen

How do you hire an elephant?

Stand it on four bricks!

What's the difference between a ginger and a brick?

Bricks get laid.

What is Klaus Teuber's (designer of Settlers of Catan) favorite TV show?

Brick and Orety

How do you hire a horse?

Put a brick under each hoof!

What is the difference between a brick and a blonde?

If you lay a brick it doesn't follow you home.

What do a brick and I have in common?

We both get laid by hand.

What did one brick say to the other?

Guess who's gettin' laid tomorrow!

What's the difference between a Redditor and a brick?

The brick will eventually get laid.

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Why did the fish sink?

This joke composed by my seriously autistic friend Neil, who LOVES jokes) Because it was a brick.

Which pig is she?

Me: What do you mean 4: Is her house made of bricks or sticks

How many bricks do you need to screw in a lightbulb?

Just two, but you're going to need a lot of patience and light bulbs.

What's red and bad for your teeth?

A Brick.

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What do you get when you cross a Jamaican with a ginger?

A gingerbreadmon.

What has an N, an I, two G's, an E, and an R and can be used to describe people of a certain color?

GINGER.

Screw Jokes More Screw Jokes

How many children with ADHD does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Wanna go swimming?

What has 90 balls and screws old women?

Bingo!

Look Jokes More Look Jokes

Why couldn't the anthropologist find any Lomekwian tools?

They were looking in Oldowan places

Where could you look up Joan of Arc's profile?

On Tinder.

Redditor Jokes More Redditor Jokes

How do you keep a Redditor busy for hours?

Click Here(http://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/ou62j/howdoyoukeeparedditorbusyforhours/)

What is it called when a Redditor writes about his life?

A meme-oir

Constipate Jokes More Constipate Jokes

When Bruce Banner gets constipated do you think he turns into The Hulk?

Just one of the thoughts I have during important business meetings

What does a mathematics professor do when he is constipated?

He works it out with a pencil.

Hurt Jokes More Hurt Jokes

Why doesn't Jesus play volleyball?

All those spikes hurt his hands

What two things should people stop shaking because shaking hurts these things development?

Polaroid Integral Film and Babies

Brick Layer Jokes More Brick Layer Jokes

What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick-layer!

What do you call a constipated mason?

A brick-layer.

Fruit Jokes More Fruit Jokes

What did the doctor say When a fruit walked into his office that was feeling like a vegetable?

What's tomato with you!

Why did the fruit leave office?

Because he was imPEACHED! lol. i hate myself.