Fly Jokes

What did the pig say when it found a fly in its soup?

Yum Yum.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

What do you call a long vegetable that flies in a V?

Asparagoose

What's green, has a cape, and flies?

Super Pickle!

What do you call a flying Grizzly?

A bearoplane

What's the difference between a Boko Haram training camp and a Nigerian refugee camp?

I don't know, I just fly the fighter jet.

What did the pilot say when his plane wasn't flying?

Aw man, that's a drag.

What do we want...?

LOW FLYING AIRPLANES!" When do we want it "NEEEEOOOOOOOOOOW"

What's hairy and flies through the air?

Jonathan Livingstone Gorilla!

What do you call an airplane that flies backwards?

A receeding airline.... bada boom! The little bros joke book is pure gold

Why was the pilot flying circles over South Korea?

He was Seoul searching.

Why is your brother always flying off the handle?

Second Boy: Because he's got a screw loose!

Couple's Daily Question Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

How do you picture yourself flying on a broom?

By witchful thinking.

What flies through the jungle singing opera?

The parrots of Penzance!

What has four wheels and flies?

A rubbish bin!

What do you call a fly when it retires?

A flew.

What does it mean when the Post Office flag is flying at half-staff?

They are hiring.

Why couldn't the chicken fly through the window?

It was closed.

Why do moths fly with their legs apart?

Have you ever seen the size of moth balls

Why did the vulture fly United Airlines?

Because they allow 1 free carrion

Why are Chameleons surprisingly good at flying?

Because they are always in duh skies

Why do seagulls fly over the sea and not the bay?

Because if they did they would be Bagels

What's all white and can't fly?

Harrison Ford

What is the difference between reindeer and caribou?

Reindeer are the ones that fly.

What is long, brown and covered in flies?

The welfare line.

What the difference between a ISIS member and a child?

I don't know, I just fly the drones.

Where do flying pigs land?

The airpork!

What do you call someone who crashes flying dinosaurs into buildings?

A pterrorist

Why are 9/11 jokes never funny?

Because they always fly over everyone's head.

What flies around your light at night and can bite off your head?

A tiger moth!

What did one frog say.to the other?

Time's sure fun when you're having flies!

What do flies do at church?

Flyspray

What would happen if pigs could fly?

Bacon would go up!

Why were the flies playing football in saucer?

They where playing for the cup!

What's the difference between a pair of jeans and an Ethiopian?

A pair of jeans only has one fly on it

Why do waiters like Gorillas better than flies?

Did you ever hear a customer complain 'Waiter there's a Gorilla in my soup!'

What do you call a bird that flies over a baseball stadium?

A fowl!

When you see geese flying in V formation, have you ever noticed that one side of the V is longer than the other?

Well, there's a reason for that. There are more geese on that side.

Why did the prophylactic fly across the room?

It was peed off.

Why don't they let Italians swim in Long Island Sound?

If you know that one, try this one: Why do seagulls fly to the dump

What do you call a flying skunk?

A smellicopter!

What's the difference between a preschool and a terrorist training camp?

Don't ask me...I just fly the drones!

What's wrong with the plane that flies to Holland?

It Netherlands.

What do you call a black guy that flys a plane?

A pilot, you racist!

What wobbles as it flies?

A jelly-copter.

Why do buzzards prefer to fly?

Because they really like their carry-on..... yeah total dad joke, i know.

What do you call Japanese people that fly planes?

Pirates.

Why were the inventors of the airplane correct in thinking they could fly?

Because they were Wright.

What's the difference between Isis hostages and Isis terrorists?

Don't ask me, I just fly the drones...

What do you get if your budgie flies into the blender?

Shredded Tweet!

What is big hairy and can fly?

King Kongcorde!

Why don't you shoo those flies?

Bull: I'll let them go barefoot!

What do you think of this, you spin really fast and I'll fly a kite from the wind you make?

I'm not a big fan.

Why couldn't the monk who flew a helicopter understand the monk who flew commercial jets?

Because he was on a higher plane.

What happens when you cross a fly and a mountain climber?

Trick question, you can't cross a vector and a scalar.

What's got six legs and can fly long distances?

Three swallows!

What's brown and white and flies all over?

Thanksgiving turkey when you carve it with a chain saw!

What monster flies his kite in a rain storm?

Benjamin Frankenstein

What keeps fish from flying of Niagara Falls?

They don't have a pilots license.

Why do waiters prefer elephants to flies?

Have you ever heard anyone complaining of a elephant in their soup.

Why couldn't Billy the Jet go flying with his friends?

Because he was grounded.

What did one frog say to the other frog?

Time's fun when you're having flies.

Why did the monster lie on his back?

To trip up low-flying aircraft.

Which fly makes films?

Stephen Speilbug!

What's a penguins favourite relative?

Aunt Arctica! PENGUIN.. ME makes flies over head motion PENGUIN I don't know what that means

Why couldn't the rabbit fly home for Easter?

He didn't have the hare fare.

Why is peter pan always flying?

Because he neverlands

What do you call a fly without wings?

A walk.

What kind of bagel can fly?

A plain bagel.

Why do birds fly south for the winter?

Because it's too far to walk.

Why did the kid throw the watch out the window?

So time would fly.

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Which is the quickest way to reach the hospital?

Bernard pushed him under a truck...

When did you first miss it dear?

Professor: When I reached up to close it after the rain had stopped.

Brazilian Jokes More Brazilian Jokes

How many people from rio does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A Brazilian. Saw this joke elsewhere and thought i'd share it here.

How many South Americans are boycotting the World Cup final?

Brazilians

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a a women's track team and a tribe of pygmy's?

One is a cunning bunch of runts and the the is a running bunch of.....nevermind.

What's the difference between a hedgehog and a Ferrari?

The pricks are on the outside of a hedgehog.

Look Jokes More Look Jokes

Why does a pencil shave?

To look sharp

What did the mayonnaise say to the man opening the fridge door?

Don't look. I'm dressing.

Plain Bagel Jokes More Plain Bagel Jokes

What kind of bagel can fly?

A plain bagel.

What kind of bagel can fly?

A plain bagel.

Paste Jokes More Paste Jokes

What do you call a fly without wings?

Paste unoriginal joke here)

Why did people stop printing stamps with photo of Pamela Anderson?

Banta: Because people started licking the wrong side of it for pasting them on the envelopes..

Opinion Jokes More Opinion Jokes

What is your opinion on women making 75% of a man's wages for the same job?

I said "Congratulations!!!"

What's the difference between Pizza and your opinion?

I asked for Pizza #KingOfjokes

Fly Saucer Jokes More Fly Saucer Jokes

Where did the Martian put his teacup?

On his flying saucer.

What did the alien say when his flying saucer landed in a stud farm?

Take me to your breeder!