Insect Jokes

What did the insect say when he saw a gnat get hit?

He did gnat see that coming

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What insect is the Wood Ant related to?

The Should Ant and the Could Ant.

Why won't you ever see an ant walk in a church?

They're insects.

Why don't ants go to church?

Because they are insects.

What do you call insects of the order Mantodea during mating season?

Laying mantises.

What did the pink panther have all over his house after he fumigated for insects?

Dead ants... dead ants... dead ants, dead ants, dead ants, dead ants, dead aaaaantsss

Why did the polar bears on Noah's Ark hang out near the insects?

They were looking for the ark tick.

Which insect didn't play well in goal?

The fumble bee!

What insect runs away from everything?

A flee!

What insect is good at math?

An account-ant.

What insect does a neckbeard keep as a pet?

M'ladybug

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What happened to the man who turned into an insect?

He just beetled off!

What do you call an insect that gets exposed to radiation but nothing of consequence happens to it?

A moot ant

What's the difference between a bug and an insect?

Judging by Table 5's reactions, not a lot.

What kind of insects to secret agents like?

As told by my 9 yr old) Spiders.

What insect can be spelled with just one letter?

Bee.

Which is the only insect that needs to wear shoes?

Mosqui-toes.

What do you get if you cross a firefly and a moth?

An insect who can find its way around a dark wardrobe!

What do you get if you cross the Lone Ranger with an insect?

The Masked-quito!

What do insects learn at school?

Mothmatics!

Why does the Fonz dress up as an insect when going on a journey?

Because he wants to get from ayy to bee.

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What lives in gum trees?

Stick insects!

What do you call an insect with magical powers?

A spelling bee.

What do you get if you cross a moth with a firefly?

An insect that can find its way around a dark closet.

What do you get if you cross an insect and a dance?

A cricket ball!

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What's the difference between a dim monster and a birthday candle?

The candle is a thousand times brighter!

Why didn't the sun have to attend university?

It's already got thousands of degrees.

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What did the Pink Panther say when he stepped on an ant?

Dead ant. Dead ant. Dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead annnnnnnnttt.

What did Pink Panther say when he stepped on an ant?

Dead Ant, Dead Ant....Dead Ant, Dead Ant, Dead Ant...

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What did pancake Chip say to his friend pancake Berry when Berry was sad?

Don't feel blue, Berry, things will get batter

Why was the electoral map feeling down?

It wasn't, it was feeling blue.

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How many gnats does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

It only takes two, but the trick is getting them in the lightbulb.

What did the insect say when he saw a gnat get hit?

He did gnat see that coming

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What do space-related scientists call themselves in Australia?

Austronomers

What insect is the Wood Ant related to?

The Should Ant and the Could Ant.

House Jokes More House Jokes

Who's there! Alistair! Alistair who?

Alistairs in this house are broken!

What do you call houses who have good behavior?

Manors.

Lack Toe Jokes More Lack Toe Jokes

Why couldn't the infant insect without toes drink milk?

He was lack toes and toddler ant

What do you call a man with no feet and is allergic to milk?

Lack-toes intolerant