Library Jokes

Where does Sean Connery keep his guns?

In the library of course. They're for shelf-defense.

Everyday Deserves a Joke

Everyday Deserves a Joke

What's the tallest building in your city?

The library, because it has the most stories.

Where can you find lubricant in the library?

In the non-friction section.

What's the tallest building in the world?

A library, because there are so many stories. (Did Not Make Up this Joke)

Why did the clock get banned from the library?

It tocked too much

What is the tallest building in the entire world?

Q: What is the tallest building in the entire world? A: The library, because it has so many stories.

What is the definition of a Barbarian?

It's someone who cuts hair in a library.

What do you call a dog in the library?

A hush puppy.

What's the most dishonest place on earth?

The Library

What do you call a hundred year old man who dies in the library?

Overdue

What was the preferred magazine of the bear that hung out behind the library?

Digest Readers.

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

What's the tallest building?

A library, because it has so many stories.

How many nuns were at the library?

Absolutely nun

I couldn't get a reservation at the library...

They were fully booked.

What is the tallest building in the world?

The library, it’s got the most stories!

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Shelf Jokes More Shelf Jokes

What did the bookshelf say when it looked in the mirror?

I can see my shelf

What ghost did Ebenezer Scrooge encounter when he refurnished his home?

The shadow of his former shelf.

Crack Jokes More Crack Jokes

Why did the chick disappoint his mother?

Because he wasn't all he was *cracked up* to be.

What do alcoholics and necrophiliacs have in common?

They both love to crack open a cold one.

Earth Jokes More Earth Jokes

Why is the moon tastier than Earth?

It's meteor.

What did the worm say to the other when he was late home?

Where in earth have you been!

Dinosaur Jokes More Dinosaur Jokes

What do you call a dinosaur having brunch?

Tea-Rex

What would you call it when a dinosaur gets into a car crash?

Tyrannosaurus Wrecks

Need Jokes More Need Jokes

What do you need to fix it?

Asparagus. (A spare, I guess)

Why were the pirates on the ship fighting?

They needed better anchor management.

City Jokes More City Jokes

What US city has the dirtiest waffles?

San Diego

Where do mathematicians go to gamble?

Sine city

Fall Jokes More Fall Jokes

How did the geologist develop a career as an expert in sinkholes?

He fell into it.

What happened to the man who owned a riding academy?

Business kept falling off!

Toe Jokes More Toe Jokes

Why do ballerinas stand on their toes?

Can't they just get taller women

What did a cell say to his sister cell, when she stepped on his toe?

Mitosis!