Toast Jokes

What's the difference between Frenchmen and some toast?

You can make soldiers out of toast!

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

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What did Shakespeare spread on his toast?

Blue Sonnet

What do astronauts put on their toast?

Space Jam.

Why did the plane crash?

Because the pilot was a loaf of bread! Now he's toast

What do termites put on their toast?

Door jamb.

What does the Queen put on her toast?

Maamilade! Tada....... anyone? Anyone? I'll get my coat

What do neckbeards like to spread on their toast?

Marma'lady

What do you get if you put morphine on your toast?

Crumfortably Numb!

What did Jesus want when he appeared on a piece of toast?

Miracle whip.

How do al-Qaeda like their toast?

Bean-laden

How does Darth Vader like his toast?

On the dark side.

Everyday Deserves a Joke

Everyday Deserves a Joke

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What if they found the face of Jesus in a piece of toast but it was *actually* Jesus?

This is my body, I'm nice with jam.

What kind of cheese?

Me: "American..." Her: "Want it toasted " Me: "I'll just make it myself."

What's the difference between toilet paper and toast?

Toast is brown on both sides.

Why did the boy feel warm on his birthday?

Because people kept toasting him!

What do you call the outer edge of a piece of bread that has been toasted?

Crusty

What would Ed Sheeran taste like on a piece of toast?

Gingerbread

Did you hear about the bread factory burning down?

They say the business is toast.

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Shakespeare Jokes More Shakespeare Jokes

What did the math text book say to the Shakespeare text book?

Look, buddy, I've already got a lot of problems, and I really don't need any of your drama.

What did Shakespeare spread on his toast?

Blue Sonnet

Breakfast Jokes More Breakfast Jokes

What do sick cannibals have for breakfast?

Vitamin bills!

What do you call breakfast?

Breaking fast yooo!

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a paddling pool and a swimming pool?

Deep ends really.

What's the difference between toilet paper and the shower curtain?

So you're the one.... (only if you answered "i don't know")

Taste Jokes More Taste Jokes

How can you tell God is a man?

If God was a woman sperm would taste like chocolate

What does a 90 year old woman taste like?

Depends.

Astronaut Jokes More Astronaut Jokes

Why did the kid with muscular dystrophy want to be an astronaut, a doctor, a lawyer, and a NASCAR driver when he grew up?

He had a lot of aspirations.

Why is it hard dating an astronaut?

Because they have space issues.

Pregnant Girlfriend Jokes More Pregnant Girlfriend Jokes

What's the difference between a light bulb and my pregnant girlfriend?

I can unscrew a lightbulb.

What has a slice of burnt toast and a pregnant girlfriend got in common?

In both cases you wish you took it out a few seconds earlier.

Coat Jokes More Coat Jokes

What's the worst part about locking your keys in your car outside of a Planned Parenthood?

Going inside to ask for a coat hanger.

Where do frogs leave their hats and coats?

In the croakroom!

Like Jokes More Like Jokes

What did the fisherman do when he really liked a woman?

He invited her over to net fish and krill.

What is the difference between a philanthropist and Nicki Minaj?

A philanthropist likes to impress people with his larg**esse**!