Toast Jokes

What did Shakespeare spread on his toast?

Blue Sonnet

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug

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What do astronauts put on their toast?

Space Jam.

Why did the plane crash?

Because the pilot was a loaf of bread! Now he's toast

What do termites put on their toast?

Door jamb.

What does the Queen put on her toast?

Maamilade! Tada....... anyone? Anyone? I'll get my coat

What do neckbeards like to spread on their toast?

Marma'lady

What did Jesus want when he appeared on a piece of toast?

Miracle whip.

How does Darth Vader like his toast?

On the dark side.

What if they found the face of Jesus in a piece of toast but it was *actually* Jesus?

This is my body, I'm nice with jam.

What kind of cheese?

Me: "American..." Her: "Want it toasted " Me: "I'll just make it myself."

What's the difference between toilet paper and toast?

Toast is brown on both sides.

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

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Why did the boy feel warm on his birthday?

Because people kept toasting him!

What do you call the outer edge of a piece of bread that has been toasted?

Crusty

What would Ed Sheeran taste like on a piece of toast?

Gingerbread

Did you hear about the bread factory burning down?

They say the business is toast.

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Neckbeard Jokes More Neckbeard Jokes

What do neckbeards like to spread on their toast?

Marma'lady

What's a Neckbeards' favourite colour?

M'genta

Side Jokes More Side Jokes

How can you tell that the stage is level?

The drummer is drooling out of sides of his mouth.

Why do older polygons make sure their sides all stay an equal length?

It keeps you regular.

Iraqi Jokes More Iraqi Jokes

What do an Iraqi baby, an American president, and a homesick Brit visiting Jerusalem all want?

They all want either pees, peace or peas in the middle east.

What did the Iraqi refugee say when he crossed the border?

Iran!

Queen Jokes More Queen Jokes

What do you call a circle of $100 bills?

Aretha Franklins! (Happy birthday to the Queen of Soul!)

Who's gonna be the next queen of R&ampB?

I don't know yet but she's gonna be Beyondce!

Coat Jokes More Coat Jokes

Why is a dog so warm in Summer?

He wears a coat and pants.

How do painters stay warm?

They add another coat.

Slice Jokes More Slice Jokes

How do you greet a slice of bread in Germany?

Gluten tag! Ba-dum tss.

What's the difference between a slice of toast and the French?

You can make soldiers out of a slice of toast.

Toilet Paper Jokes More Toilet Paper Jokes

Why didn't the toilet paper cross the road?

It didn't want to get stuck in any cracks.

Why do you take toilet paper to the twilight zone?

DODODODODODODODODODODODODODODODODODODODODO

Spread Jokes More Spread Jokes

What do you get when the Pillsbury dough boys bend over?

Dough-nuts (South Park reference again just spreading it).

What do you call mints you can spread through social media?

Memementos