Propose Jokes

What did the string say when the rope proposed marriage?

Let's knot.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug
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How does a nihilist propose to his fiancee?

Even though my existence is meaningless I want to spend the rest of it with you.

How did the stoner propose to his girlfriend?

Marriage, you wanna?

How did the pothead propose to his girlfriend?

Marriage.. you wanna?

What did the melon say to the banana when it proposed?

Yes! But we cantaloupe.

What did Shakespeare say when Mr. Big proposed to him?

Noth

What did Patrick Stewart say when he proposed to his wife?

Engage.

How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.

What did the melon tell her boyfriend when he proposed?

Yes but we cantaloupe.

How do you propose to a stoner?

Marriage, you wanna

How did the rice crispy propose to the cornflake?

It Snapped, Crackled and Popped the question.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug
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Which his guide had proposed to climb. - Do people tumble down often here?

No, the guide said, one time is usually enough.

Why don't women propose to men?

Because the guy'd always be disappointed when she took out a ring.

How does a hamster propose to his girlfriend?

With a hamst-ring! I'm sorry.

When a coworker tells everyone he proposed, I'm the guy that asks, "So, what did she say?

I'm funny that way.

How did a Hispanic farmer propose to his girlfriend?

With arroz.

How did the phone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.

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Pothead Jokes More Pothead Jokes

Why doesn't Connecticut have a name for it people?

What I mean is that people from NY are New Yorkers, people from California are Californian, and coincidentally people from Colorado and Washington are Potheads.

What do you call a pothead that breaks up with his girlfriend?

Homeless

Good Joke Jokes More Good Joke Jokes

What would be your reply?

Someone stops you in the middle of the road and asks you to tell him a good joke, What would be your reply?

What happens when i find a good joke?

I reddit.

Separate Jokes More Separate Jokes

Why do Newfies want Qubec to separate?

So it's a shorter drive to Toronto!

What is the best method of separating juice?

By concentration.

Spend Jokes More Spend Jokes

Why do goalkeepers spend ages on the Internet?

Because they can't stop saving their work.

Why did the guy spend the entire day throwing out his surplus of herbs?

He had too much thyme on his hands.

Big Jokes More Big Jokes

What did Shakespeare say when Mr. Big proposed to him?

Noth

What city has the biggest amount of mistakes per capita?

Uppsala

Question Jokes More Question Jokes

How does William Shakespeare make chili?

With beans? Or not with beans? That is the question.

What do you calla brown guy that asks a lot of question?

A curry-ous guy

Comment Jokes More Comment Jokes

What do you award to someone who comments in a thread from a month ago?

Reddit Old

What's the most annoying thing in the internet?

People who comment "repost" on a Joke subreddit.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

Why do Kenyans always win marathons?

At the end, they get a bag of chips and a Coke. -My dad told me this joke when we went to a race-

What did the dumb blonde say when told that "Scheherezade" was composed by Rimsky-Korsakov?

"Why'd his mom choose to call him Rimsky of all names!! "