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Soap Jokes

What the difference between a nun in a bathtub & a nurse in the bathtub?

One has soul full of hope & one has a hole full of soap... I'll walk myself out, sorry first post here

I Love Pizza & You

I Love Pizza & You

What's the difference between a Nun and a lady taking a bath?

The Nun has hope in her soul and the lady taking a bath has soap in her hole.

What is the difference between a girl in a church, and a girl in a bathtub?

The girl in the church has hope in her soul, and the girl In the bathtub has soap in her hole.

What's an alcoholic's favorite type of soap?

Bar soap.

Why did the boxer bring a bar of soap into the ring?

The referee said he wanted a clean fight.

What happened to the boy-band member who dropped the soap In the prison shower?

Let's just say that his backstreet went more than One Direction.

Why did the meteorologist bring a bar of soap to work?

He was expecting showers.

What should you do if you see an epileptic having a seizure in a bathtub?

Throw in a load of laundry, and soap

What did Larry McMurtry say when his neighbor asked to borrow a bar of soap?

He said "Sure! I could loan some Dove".

What kind of soap do Middle Eastern citizens use?

Arab spring

Why did the little pig hide the soap?

He heard the farmer yell "Hogwash!"

Love

Love

How did Mummy know you hadn't had a bath?

Eve: I forgot to dirty the towel wet the soap and flood the bathroom.

How did your mom know you hadn't washed your face?

I forgot to wet the soap.

Why should you never trust soap?

It's an emulsive lyer.

Who steals all the soap in the bathroom?

The robber ducky

What kind of soap do you use to clean a dirty joke?

Bawdy wash.

Which birds steal soap from the bath?

Robber ducks!

Where's the soap?

Yes, it does." she replies.

Which villains steal soap from the bath?

Robber ducks.

Why in the hell would I clean my bathtub?

I put soap and water in there every day...

What did the soap say to the hands as they were being washed?

I think we're in sink.

Love Card

Love Card

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Where is the best place for a 1-legged waitress to work?

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Conetainers

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What do ghosts order at the bar?

Sam-BOO!-ca

Why were the Seven Dwarfs kicked out of the bar?

Because they were Miners...

Money Jokes More Money Jokes

What do women and the stock market have in common?

If you don't pull out in time, it will cost you a lot of money. My boss said he made this up on the spot yesterday. Never heard it before so I figured I'd post it.

What will you do with a million watermelons?

I don't want the watermelons, I just want the money.

Liquid Soap Jokes More Liquid Soap Jokes

Why did they start using liquid soaps in prisons?

If you thought because you can't drop it, guess again) Because it takes longer to pick up.

Why do they use liquid soap in the Navy?

It takes longer to pick up

Walk Jokes More Walk Jokes

When's the best time to take your doberman pinscher for a walk?

Anytime he wants to go.

What does Michael Bolton say when he walks into an elevator?

This place rocks!

Spanish Jokes More Spanish Jokes

How do you say dinner in Spanish?

JOHN CENA

What do you call an old Spanish car?

FeO

Mexican Jokes More Mexican Jokes

What did the Mexican shopkeeper say to the thief?

That's Nachos.

Why were Mexicans celebrating at a stop sign?

They saw it as a sign to pare.

Nun Jokes More Nun Jokes

What do you get if you cross a nun and a chicken?

A pecking order.

What's a nuns favorite day of the week?

Sununday.