Cure Jokes

Why doesn't cancer let anyone in a music store?

It doesn't want anyone to find The Cure.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

How do you cure a headache?

Put your head through a window and the pane will just disappear!

How do you cure depression?

A gun.

What did the apathetic philosopher doctor say?

Who cures?

What did the smoked salmon say after it realised it was no longer ill?

I'm cured!

What did the blind man say when he sipped a frozen drink and was cured?

Icee.

What did the cannibal Doctor do with his patients?

He cured them.

How do you cure a mute coworker?

Tell them a secret

Why do pigs run from medicine?

They hate getting cured.

What's the one thing make a wish foundation can't give you?

The cure

What makes a salami excited?

When the ham is cured!

Couple's Daily Question Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

How do mathematicians cure constipation?

They work it out with a pencil.

How do you cure the hiccups?

Dunk your head in a bucket of water and pull it out twice.

What's the difference between eugenics and a charity marathon?

The second one's a race for the cure. Shamelessely stolen from.

What did the man in the "Race for a Cure" say to the three people beside him?

We're walking four abreast.

Why did the University of Oklahoma researcher stay awake every night?

He was trying to find a cure for insomnia.

How did the monster cure his sore throat?

He spent all day gargoyling.

Why aren't PhDs real doctors?

Because real doctors have cures.

How to cure affluenza?

Introduce him to Warhammer.

What do you call an egg that cures cancer?

A keurig. Joke written by my 9 year old son.

How did they cure the swine flu?

With oinkment.

How does a mathematician cure constipation?

How does a mathematician cure her constipation She works it out with a pencil.

How did the Mathematician cure his constipation?

He worked it out with a pencil.

How do you cure the bird flu versus swine flu?

One you use tweetment and the other, oinkment

What's the cure for world hunger?

Food

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Window Jokes More Window Jokes

What version of windows does Jesus use?

XP Edit: Explanation(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ChiRho)

Why did Microsoft name their new operating system Windows 10?

Because Windows 7 8 9!

Gun Jokes More Gun Jokes

How many NRA spokesmen does it take to change a lightbulb?

More guns!

What's the difference between a gun and amnesia?

Oh shoot, I forgot...

Music Store Jokes More Music Store Jokes

What do ya call a bunch of guys breaking into a music store and helping themselves to the stringed instruments?

Luters.

Why doesn't cancer let anyone in a music store?

It doesn't want anyone to find The Cure.

Wish Foundation Jokes More Wish Foundation Jokes

What do you call three Make-a-Wish Foundation kids?

A genie.

What's the one thing make a wish foundation can't give you?

The cure

Hate Jokes More Hate Jokes

Why would two melons in love hate their parents?

Because they cantaloupe. =D.....=).....=='(

What do jedi hate the most?

Forced jokes.

Constipation Jokes More Constipation Jokes

How did the mathematician solve his problem with constipation?

He worked it out with a pencil

What did the accountant with constipation do?

He worked is out with a pencil.

Pane Jokes More Pane Jokes

How do you cure a headache?

Put your head through a window and the pane will just disappear!

What do you call a window that can rap?

Two Panes

Disappear Jokes More Disappear Jokes

How do you cure a headache?

Put your head through a window and the pane will just disappear!

What was the best magic trick Osama Bin Laden ever pulled?

He made the World Trade Center disappear.