Edward Jokes

Why did Edward miss his flight out of Russia?

Because he was Snowden.

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

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Why didn't Edward get on the plane?

Cause it was snowed-in.

Why is Edward still in Russia?

He's Snowden.

Why could Edward not leave his driveway and get back to his home country?

He was Snowden.

Why was Edward stuck at the Russian airport?

Because he was Snowden.

Why didn't Edward leave his house?

Because he was Snowden.

Why couldn't Edward leave Russia?

Because he was Snowden.

Why couldn't Edward leave the Airport?

Because he was Snowden...

Why didn't Edward leave Russia?

Cause he was snowden.

Whose son was Edward the Black Prince?

Old King Coal!

Why can't Edward leave Russia this winter?

He'll be Snowden.

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Why did the mother of twins name both of her sons Edward?

Because two Eds are better than one.

Why does Edward never leave Russia?

He's always Snowden.

Why can't Edward leave Russia?

He's Snowden.

What do you call a monster with a wooden head?

Edward.

What do you call a government official that can't leave an airport because of a blizzard?

Edward Snowed In

Why isn't Edward leaving Russia?

Because he's snowed in.

Why was Edward unable to get out of Russia?

Because he was Snowd en! (according to my friends this joke has been around for awhile, but I hadn't seen it yet, and wanted to share the goof)

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Edward Snow Jokes More Edward Snow Jokes

What do you call an NSA whistle-blower spending the winter in Russia?

Edward Snowed-in

What do you get when you cross a whistle with a blizzard?

Edward Snowed-in

Spend Jokes More Spend Jokes

What do you call a spy that likes to spend time with his son?

James Bonding bah dun tss

How JokeExplainBot spent his weekend?

Explaining his wife.

Stick Jokes More Stick Jokes

What did the pay phone say when the quarter got stuck inside it?

Money's tight these days!

Why is Jesus never able to finish more than half of a crossword puzzle?

He always gets stuck on across.

Plot Jokes More Plot Jokes

How did the townsfolk find out the pigeons were plotting a revolution?

They heard them in the town square saying, "Coup, coup!"

What's a farmers favourite part of a novel?

The plot.

Whistle Jokes More Whistle Jokes

Why can't humans hear a dog whistle?

Because dogs can't whistle. (X-post from r/dadjokes)

Why do women parachutists wear cups?

So they won't whistle on the way down.

Black Prince Jokes More Black Prince Jokes

Whose son was Edward the Black Prince?

Old King Coal!

Plane Jokes More Plane Jokes

What's that diving?

Is it a bird, Is it a plane... No it's the British Pound...

When I was on the plane the stewardess asked, do you need some headphones?

I said, Hell Yeah, but how did you know my name was Phones

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

What did the fancy cat say when he wanted to leave?

Le meow

Why are a lot of Italians named Tony?

Because as they got on the boat to leave Italy, they were stamped on the head, "TO NY".