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Sand Jokes

Why don't drug addicts hang out at the beach?

They don't like getting sand in their crack.

Your Age Is Only Math
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Your Age Is Only Math

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Why is the sand at the beach Wet?

Because the sea weed.

Why don't women like drinking beer at the beach?

Because they'll get sand in their schlitz.

What did the sea say to the sand?

Nothing, it simply waved.

What do you call a Mexican rolling in sand?

A churro.

What's the difference between a bucket of sand and a bucket of afterbirth?

You can't gargle with the sand.

Why should you not tell jokes to sand paper?

It's a rough crowd...Ba da bum chssh

Why don't women drink beer at the beach?

Because they'll get sand in their Schlitz.

Why can't you starve in a desert?

Because of all the sand which is there.

Why did the music critic compare the song to a foul-mouthed mixture of sand and wind?

Because it was Da-rude Sandstorm

What do you call a waffle that's been buried in sand?

Sandiego (The first joke I ever made as a kid)

Birthday State of Mind
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Birthday State of Mind

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Why is the sand so quiet?

Because the waves keep going "shhhhhh".

What is the worst type of sand to have in your pants?

Sandusky

What's older than sand?

The reposts on reddit.

Why was the sand wet?

Because the seaweed.

Why is it impossible to starve in a desert?

Because of the sand, which is everywhere.

What's the difference between menstrual fluid and sand?

You can't gargle sand.

What did I do in my 3-year-old?

I ate sand.

What do you call a gust of wind full of sand?

A rough draft

What's the difference between a truckload of sand and a truckload of babies?

You can't unload sand with pitchforks.

Why is it impossible to starve in the desert?

Because of the sand which is there.

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes
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I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

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Why will you never go hungry in a desert?

Because of all the sand which is there.

What do you have when you have a mother in law buried up to her neck in sand?

Not enough sand.

Why were the camels wearing sandals?

To stop themselves sinking into the sand. Why did the ostrich stick its head in the sand To look at the camels who forgot to put their sandals on.

Why does the man go to the beach when he's hungry?

Because of the sand which is there.

What do you do after you make a rough castle on the beach?

You sand it!

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Mother Jokes More Mother Jokes

What's the penalty for bigamy?

Two mothers-in-law.

What's the world's longest Ted Talk?

How I Met Your Mother

Bury Jokes More Bury Jokes

Why are Lawyers buried forty feet deep when they die?

Because deep down they're really nice people.

Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn!

Sink Jokes More Sink Jokes

What do you call a sink that doesn't work?

A faux-cet.

What happens if you drop a blue marble in the Red Sea?

It sinks. (Courtesy of my 9 year old daughter)

Sinko Jokes More Sinko Jokes

What do you call four bullfighters in quicksand?

Quatro sinko

Cuatro Cinco Jokes More Cuatro Cinco Jokes

What do you call 4 Mexicans in quick sand?

Cuatro cinco

What do you call four Mexicans that have drowned?

Cuatro Cinco.

Truckload Jokes More Truckload Jokes

What's the difference between a truckload of dead woodchucks and a truckload of bowling balls?

You can't unload a truckload of bowling balls with a pitchfork!

What's the difference between a truckload of sand and a truckload of babies?

You can't unload sand with pitchforks.

Sandal Jokes More Sandal Jokes

Why were the camels wearing sandals?

To stop themselves sinking into the sand. Why did the ostrich stick its head in the sand To look at the camels who forgot to put their sandals on.

What Nationality was Otzi the Caveman?

He wasn't Italian, because he carried work tools, he wasn't Austrian, since he had some brains, he might have been Swiss, since he was outrun by a glacier, but most probably he was a German, because nobody else ever walks in sandals in the mountains.

Schlitz Jokes More Schlitz Jokes

Why don't women drink beer at the beach?

Because they'll get sand in their Schlitz.

Why don't women like drinking beer at the beach?

Because they'll get sand in their schlitz.