Guitar Jokes

Why won't Jonas Bjerre, Johan Wohlert nor Silas Utke Graae Jrgensen use guitars?

Because guitars make music.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug

How does a lawyer from Panama play his guitar?

He shreds.

What's the difference between a guitar and a fish?

You can tune a guitar but you can't tuna fish.

What's the difference between my guitar and my girlfriend?

My guitar doesn't yell at me when I snap it's g-string

What did the guitars do when they were unhappy with their government?

Formed a coustic d'tat

What do a guitar and a drum have in common?

Neither of them are a clarinet!

Why do guitar amps hum?

Because they don't know the words.

What's the difference between a guitar and an elevator?

I didn't expose myself inside a guitar this morning.

What does former Vice President Gore play on the guitar?

An algorithm

What do you call a cow that plays the guitar?

A Moosician!

What did Al Gore play on his guitar?

An algorithm.

Everyday Deserves a Joke

Everyday Deserves a Joke

What's the fastest way to make money as a guitarist?

By selling your guitar.

Why did the guitarist leave his guitar on the ground?

It didn't have any pickups

How does a dog play Hendrix on guitar?

With a chihuahua pedal.

Why did Silly Sue throw her guitar away?

Because it had a hole in the middle.

What kind of guitar did the pool player own?

A-cue-stick.

What did the guitar and banjo name their daughter?

Amanda Lynn

What's the difference between a guitar and a fish?

You can tune a guitar but you can't "tuna"fish!

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Switch Jokes More Switch Jokes

Whats an Italians favourite part of football?

Half time, they get to switch sides again

What do computers and reincarnation have in common?

Switching Users

Sheet Music Jokes More Sheet Music Jokes

How do you get a guitar player to turn down his amp?

Give him sheet music.

How do you confuse a drummer?

Give him sheet music

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

Why is being a pirate addictive?

They say that after you lose your first hand, you get hooked!

What did the digital clock say to it's Mother?

Look Ma, no hands!

Tune Jokes More Tune Jokes

What's the difference between tuna, a piano, and a pot of glue?

You can tune a piano, but you can't piano a tuna!

How do you tune a fish?

With its scales!

Morning Jokes More Morning Jokes

What's a pigs favorite morning tv show?

Morning Ham

What would the blind man say every morning when he walked past the fish market?

Good morning, ladies!

Pot Jokes More Pot Jokes

Why did all of Britain stop smoking pot?

Because they all joined

Why was the cook sad when all the water in his pot boiled away?

Because he mist it.

Tuna Jokes More Tuna Jokes

Which one is the odd one out; a Crab, a Tuna, a Chinese man run over by a bus or a Lobster?

A tuna, because the rest of them are crustaceans.

How do you check the intonation of a guitar underwater?

With a tuna.

Girlfriend Jokes More Girlfriend Jokes

How many girlfriends does it take to change a lightbulb?

I don't know...

What's the difference between my guitar and my girlfriend?

My guitar doesn't yell at me when I snap it's g-string